12 Funny Valentine’s Cards to Show You Get How Lame V-Day Is

Ugh. Valentine’s Day. It’s the worst, right?

Happily, though, not all of the greeting cards associated with this somewhat questionable holiday have to be as lame as the occasion itself. Whether you hate Valentine’s Day with the passion of a thousand fiery suns or whether you realize it’s kind of dumb but dig it anyway, share the love (or spread the cynicism) this year with these 12 V-Day cards.

Why limit sharing the love to just one day a year?

364 Days Greeting Card, $3.49, (or email it for free at

Express your cynicism and your affection at the same time.

Snarky Valentine Card, $10,

Let’s not play games — we know what today is really about.

Cute Butt Valentine Card, $4,

Nothing says “Happy Valentine’s Day” like a little forced cuddling.

We Should Probably Cuddle Card, $2.40,

You raise a valid point…

Why Cupid Valentine Card, $3.49,

For the literature snob in your life.

Jane Austen Valentine Card, $2.40,

Sounds like the perfect not-date!

Valentine’s Day Alone Greeting Card, $3.49, (or email it for free at

…But I still love you, so…. Yeah.

Brain Death Feeling Card for Heart Thieves, $3.50,

Let’s just get this out of the way, shall we?

Love Card, $4,

Good news, bad news.

Pressure Valentine Card, print for free at

Let’s face it: No one actually likes conversation hearts, do they?

Meh Heart Greeting Card, $3.49,

Now that’s what I’m talking about! Bonus: It’s customizable (just in case you missed the giant “Customize it!” button).

Forget Valentine’s Day Card, $3.30,