19 Quotes From 'The West Wing's Toby Ziegler That Perfectly Describe Your Winter Blues
I'm betting you don't need me to tell you this, but we're in quite a trying time when it comes to weather right now. We're past the holidays, but spring is still a few months off, so all there is to do is sit in the gloomy doldrums and think about our lives. But being a total downer isn't all bad, because it means you finally have something in common with your favorite character from The West Wing. So what better way to celebrate your crappy attitude than with Toby Ziegler quotes that perfectly describe your winter blues?
What makes Toby the perfect character to come to your aid right now is that he almost seems to like being miserable. The way that Aaron Sorkin wrote him, and Richard Schiff brilliantly brought him to life, is such that Toby not only understands who he is and what he (dis)likes, but also takes it one step further and embraces the fact that he isn't all sunshine and rainbows. So, before you start kicking yourself for not being in the mood to go on a five-mile run in freezing sleet, or get out of bed for your old college roommate's half-birthday party who you never even really liked that much anyway, have a quick sit-down with Toby in the Oval Office, and he'll provide you with 19 West Wing quotes to perfectly describe (and embrace!) your winter blues.
1. When The Weather Cancels Something You Were Excited About
"There's nothing about this that doesn't stink. If it were me, I'd want to extract vengeance, and I'd say 'Let justice be done.'"
2. When You Get Home From Grocery Shopping And Realize You Forgot The Main Thing You Went Out For In The First Place And You Have To Go Out Again
"Have you fallen down and hit your head on something hard?"
3. When You Lose Steam Halfway Through Making A Point
"Look, a glass is half full or half... you know, the other thing..."
4. When Your Friend Is Starting To Date Someone New, But You Want Her To Stay Alone And Lonely Like You
"You're gonna lose, and you're gonna lose huge. They're gonna throw rocks at you next week, and I wanted to be standing next to you when they did."
5. When You're Being Nice To Someone At Work For Once In Your Life
"I'm gonna make a suggestion, which might help you out, but I don't want this gesture to be mistaken for an indication that I like you."
6. When You're Surveying The Enormous Mess In Your Apartment And Accepting That It's All Your Fault
"This administration doesn't even need an opposition party, you know that? We do fine by ourselves."
7. Honestly Anytime Anywhere At All
"I hate these people with the heat of a nova."
8. When Someone Asks You How You're Doing
Short and sweet.
9. When You're Trying To Talk Yourself Out The Door And To The Gym
"The things we do in our lives, many of them are not voluntary."
10. When You're Defending Your Lunch And Getting A Little Too Heated
"I don't know what kind of salad it is, I'm eating a salad, OK? I'm doing it, do I have to know the names? There's no difference between them, it's a bowl of weeds!"
11. When You Actually Make It To The Gym And Ate A Salad For Once And No One Even Seems To Care
"I need some pie."
12. When It's Been So Long Since You've Seen The Sun That You Insult Your Boss
"You know the thing about you, Mr. President? It isn't so much that you cheat. It's how brazenly bad you are at it."
13. When You're Trying To Plan A Romantic Date And You Just Don't Have The Energy
"Do you know how to, you know, cook food?"
14. When You Want To Speak Your Truth
"I'm told that on my sunniest days I'm not that fun to be around."
15. When You're Giving Advice For How To Get Through The Winter
"Listen, when you get home tonight you're going to be confronted by the instinct to drink alone. Trust that instinct. Manage the pain. Don't try to be a hero."
16. When You're At Work And You Really Shouldn't Have Come In That Day
"Somewhere in this building is our talent."
17. ...And Every Single One Of Your Coworkers Is In The Exact Same Boat
"Can I assume from your total silence and blank faces that you're all with me?"
18. When You Get Stuck Outside Your House Without An Umbrella... Again
"To our credit, sir, we knew it was raining once it started to rain."
19. And, Finally, When You Step In A Puddle
So what do you think? Feeling more equipped now, and like you might be able to actually make it through this dreariest of seasons? I'd say I have faith in you, but that would be very un-Toby Ziegler of me, so how about we all just exchange a respectful nod and go back to not talking? I'll check back in April when it's possible to be an optimistic human again.
Images: Warner Bros. Television; Giphy (6)