Oprah Turns 60 and 11 of Her Famous "Friends" Send "Gifts"

If you thought you had it hard shopping for gifts for your friends, try having to shop for Oprah Winfrey. The Queen of Everything and New Cars turns 60 today — Happy Birthday, O! — and even though she decided to forgo a birthday party because she's too totally popular doesn't mean those closest to her aren't going to reach out and gift anyway.

Considering O's status as a humble and non-braggart, we're sure she won't be dishing on what her famous friends got her, but with a little bit of ingenuity and a lot a bit of hypotheticals, we've deduced what gifts she's likely to receive.

Only by deduce we mean "completely made up" but hey — some of them sound pretty legit, if we do say so ourselves. But click through to see what you think.

by Alicia Lutes

Present from Gayle King

One free punny pass for a little alone time sans Gayle.

Image: Parker Brothers, Inc.

Present from the Obamas

The White House spare key.

Image: Ron’s Rescued Treasures

Present from Jay Z and Beyoncé


Image: AltHeadlines

Present JUST from Beyoncé

This sweatshirt.

Image: Beyoncé

Present from Kim Kardashian and Kanye West

She didn’t ask for it, but Kim and Kanye insisted on buying this Daniel Edwards statue of a pregnant Kim titled “L.A. Fertility” for her beautiful Santa Barbara home remodel.

Image: Daniel Edwards

Present from Barbra Streisand

Shade. Pure shade.

Mario Tama/Getty Images News/Getty Images

Present from Lindsay Lohan

What do you get the woman who’s giving you yet-another-goddamn-chance to jumpstart your career? How about a “Dream Folly” fantasy yurt? Because, you know, Lohan’s dreams are follies.

Image: Rainier

Present from Julia Roberts

A big, fat charitable donation to the Oprah Winfrey Leadership Academy for Girls.

Kevork Djansezian/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images

Present from John Travolta

An official Scientology at-home e-meter system.

Image: XenuTV

Present from Richard Branson

A first class, roundtrip ticket to space to prep the aliens for her inevitable intergalactic takeover.

Chris Jackson/Getty Images Entertainment/Getty Images

Present from Stedman Graham

The pure, unadulterated spotlight. Just like he gets her every year.

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