You Can Now Hang Out With Tina Fey. You're Welcome

Most of us like to imagine that on some level, Tina Fey is our best friend — or a person so perfectly suited to our sensibilities that all it would take is a chance meeting for her to become our best friend. And while, unfortunately, Fey isn't exactly holding new bestie tryouts, she is in the latest episode of Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee (below) and chatting with Jerry Seinfeld about basically everything you'd talk to her about if you had the chance.

And what is this glorious vicarious privilege like? Probably just as delightful as you've ever imagined an afternoon in New York with Fey might be. Seinfeld picks Fey up at her office, takes her out for a milkshake in Harlem then treats her to her first cronut in the West Village, all the while chatting away like the old pals you wish you and Fey could be. The video is so lovely, you almost manage to stave off envy of Seinfeld's incredible social circle. Almost.

Still, we learn some pretty incredible things about Fey, such as:

  • Her rock solid philosophy on kicking goals: "Food is the only reward." Amen, Tina. Amen.
  • She wants to write another movie, which means we might get to stop being nostalgic for Mean Girls all the time and actually praise the film that will usurp its hallowed throne. HUZZAH.
  • She wasn't "pretty enough" to hand out fragrance cards at Bloomingdale's, so she became an awesome funny person and our comedy heroine.
  • Apparently, people like Amy Poehler more than her for no good reason. She finds this hilarious.
  • Her back-up dream job is to "be in charge of the Twitter licenses" so she can keep people from saying awful things and narrating their lunches. We wouldn't have any complaints about that. Tina would be fair and wise, we're sure of it.
  • She dated a guy who told her "you really eat a lot" and she took that as a compliment, because she's a champion. (Plus, based on her description, this guy was most likely her real life Dennis Duffy from 30 Rock.)
  • She actually wears her Rolex inscribed with "Thanks for the help, mother fucker," which was a gift from Chris Rock and something she has in common with Louis C.K.

Basically, if you can't actually hang out with Tina Fey (see: most of us), this is the next best (possible) thing.