"How Women Prepare For First Dates" Is A Brutally Honest Depiction Of Double Standards & Rape Culture
The secret habits of women preparing for dates are surprising for more reasons than one. How women prepare for dates now includes a few extra steps than before. Sure, there's the shaving, the obsessive outfit changing, the hair, the makeup, the selfies, the lighting checks, the perfume bath, the pep-talks with roommates, the Googling, and the Yelping. But all that aside, safety precautions are a serious and unavoidable step in today's dating culture. How many times have you made some sort of security pact with your friends before you go meet a guy off Tinder? How many secret codes have you established with your friends, à la "If I text you a the number 4, call 911"?
The unfortunate truth is that we have reason to be nervous. We are constantly barraged with stories about women who were assaulted, raped, or even murdered on dates, and when we aren't hearing about that, we're constantly warned by other people about the dangers of going out — be it dressed a certain way, out at a certain time, or any number of conditions under which women's bodies are policed. The way this narrative goes, when a woman leaves the house and goes on a date with a stranger, she's "vulnerable" — and society places the obligation to do something about it on women themselves, rather than on the people responsible for creating that atmosphere it in the first place. The folks over at the Unsolicited Project have created a scarily accurate depiction of what it's like for us gals in online dating land. And while the subject matter is more than serious, we can take minute to laugh at how expertly they portray the absurdity of it all — since it really shouldn't be happening in the first place. Some highlights...
Just Check In On Me
What starts out as a simple buddy system ends up not feeling like enough of a net. How many times have you asked your friends to text you throughout a date?
Get A Good Look
Hell, just take a picture of what I'm wearing in case I go missing! OK, maybe some of us watch a little bit too much CSI.
While We're At It, Let's Invent A Security Texting Code
Just in general, it doesn't hurt to have a texting system in place with your friends. I set up a code with my roommate where if I send her the number "43" in a text, that means she should call me repeatedly until I answer and make up an urgent sounding story explaining why I need to leave wherever I am and go meet her. If you're feeling unsafe, you can also send a friend your pin or set up Friend Tracker.
Hell, Just Track Me
It's true, you can share your login information with a buddy and they can track you from their computer so long as your tracking is set to on. Maybe it's a bit much, maybe it's genius.
Guys Be Like
Men don't go through the same safety precautions as women do. They're less concerned with being assaulted or taken. What a luxury!
And watch the full video here: