Entertainment

What Would Ed Sheeran Be Like as a Music Teacher?

by Kristie Rohwedder

Is Ed Sheeran just a delight, or what? First, the guy rescues a tiny kitten. DELIGHTFUL. And then, Sheeran dropped by his former school to teach a music lesson. SO DELIGHTFUL! Tuesday, the singer-songwriter posted an Instagram pic of his old copy of Of Mice and Men with the caption: “Just taught a music lesson at my old school and my old English teacher left my of mice and men book from year 8. Yes Mr Jellicoe, you legend.”

Aw, I can only imagine how adorable that music lesson was. He was so sweet as an advisor on The Voice, therefore I’m inclined to assume he was just as sweet during Tuesday’s music class. I don’t think it’s a crazy stretch.

Will Sheeran teach again, or was this a one-off? I don’t know. I don’t have him on speed dial. I don’t know his life.

But the mini-lesson definitely made me consider what it would be like if Sheeran decided he wanted to take a break from the touring/recording world and become a full-time music teacher. What if Sheeran caught the educating bug? Well, I think his his syllabus might look a little something like this:

MR. ED SHEERAN’S MUSIC CLASS—SYLLABUS

CLASS RULES

  1. Be in your seat before the bell rings. How boring of me, I know. But it’s the school’s rule, not mine. I loathe handing out tardies, but I’ll do it.
  2. Be supportive of one another. Duh.
  3. Participate. Don’t be a wanker. What’s the fun in that?
  4. Once a week, I'll allow the class to ask a question about my friendship/touring with the lovely Taylor Swift. Work together on selecting a question. Choose said question wisely.

Um… I think that about covers it?

MAIN ASSIGNMENTS

  1. Learn the music I give you for the class recitals. If you don’t learn the music, not only will I fail you, but you’ll also embarrass yourself in front of an audience.
  2. There will be two class recitals. They will be your “midterm” and your “final.”
  3. Practice at least 30 minutes a day. Don’t fib about it. Just do it. Like Nike.
  4. Complete weekly music theory packets. I know, I know. That stuff is tedious and boring. But it helps, I promise! I’m not doing it to be an arse.

GRADE BREAKDOWN

20%—Attitude: Why be a prat when you can be cheery?

30%—Homework: It really is not a lot of work. It’s an easy 30% of your grade.

20%— Midterm: Learn the music for the first recital.

20%— Final: Learn the music for the second recital.

10%— Kitty Time: Occasionally, I’ll bring Graham to class. All I ask is that you’re not a shite to the little buddy. If you have a cat allergy, please let me know. Thanks!

If you ever need any assistance or after school help, let me know!

ADDENDUM

Sorry, kiddos. I blanked on the most important rule:

Image: sheeransspark/tumblr