Whether you didn't get a promotion or a long-term relationship just ended, staying positive can be really tough when things are just not going the way you want. But rather than sulking, there are some ways to stay motivated when things aren't working out, even when your future looks bleak. Even when you think you have everything under control when it comes to your life, surprises are bound to happen when you least expect them to. And while it's never easy to embrace change, there's usually way to deal with a negative situation.
According to the Huffington Post, one of the best ways to stay motivated is by simply altering your attitude."You will get what you expect. Expect something great to happen for you every day and it will. Say aloud each morning to yourself in the mirror, 'I expect something good to happen for me today,'" said career expert and CEO of Ultimate Lifestyle Enterprises Stacia Pierce. How you choose to view your problems can determine how stressed you'll feel. Instead of complaining to your loved ones about the negative things are that happening in your life, it's best to try to embrace the bad, take things one step at a time, and find a solution to your problems. Feel like your life is spinning out of control? Here are 11 ways you can stay motivated when things are just not going right.
1. Follow The Flow Of Life
As much as you would love to have everything go well all the time, it's inevitable that you'll face turmoils; and how you decide to face them can determine the type of lessons you'll learn. Just try to face each problem by embracing the negative and finding a solution. "As Pema Chodron writes, 'things come together and then they fall apart.' The natural rhythms of life include times when not all will work out or work out with ease. Coming into peace with this reality can help take the edge off the frustration or disappointment," says positive psychologist at The Kriplau Center for Yoga & Health Maria Sirois in an email interview with Bustle.
2. Remember That Things Don't Happen Over Night
Just because your success isn't happening when you want it to doesn't mean it's not going to happen at all. Hard work does pay off, and if you continue to believe in yourself, things will come to fruition in one war or another. "As long as you believe there's no such thing as failure, the only thing standing in the way of you and what you desire, is time," says Life Coach Julie Holmes in an interview with Bustle over email.
3. Focus On The Positive
Even when everything is going horribly wrong, your perspective is what truly matters. Whether you make light of situations or you write in a gratitude journal, focusing on the positive can help alleviate that extra stress in your life. "Often, even when life is difficult in one arena, such as work, it may be in flow in another (friendships for example, or personal health). We want to look for the good - not to deny that some area may be hard — but to enable us to remain optimistic, clear-eyed, and realistic in our perception. Sometimes, when one area is challenging we can make the mistake of believing that all of life is hard, which may not be true at all," says Sirois.
4. Take Care Of Yourself
There's no way you can perceive the world through rose-colored glasses if you're choosing not to take care of yourself first. "In the presence of difficulties, self-care becomes paramount. Rest, healthy eating, healthy sleep, and hygiene are basic. Those who thrive know [how] to add to any one week those activities that deeply engage us in meaningful and/or pleasurable ways. We want to keep tuned to what keeps us feeling truly alive and centered and also happy, for these experiences lead to success overall in life," says Sirois.
5. Think Outside The Box
Just because things aren't going the way you've planned doesn't mean your journey is over. Take this moment to observe the problem in a different way, and hopefully it will help you find the solution you've been looking for. "Remember that when something isn't working out, it's because there's an opportunity for a new way of thinking, acting or being. This is another way to label growth, and that's our baseline — we're constantly evolving and growing," says holistic wellness coach Pax Tandon in an interview with Bustle over email.
6. Do Things That Will Make You Happy
When life is getting you down, one of the best ways for you to pick yourself up is by focusing on things that makes you feel better. "To build in positivity boosters, such as time with friends, listening to music, a walk in the woods, or yoga, provides us not only with a temporary distraction but a lifeline of uplift that can contribute greater psychological as well as physical energy to our being," says Sirois.
7. Practice Being Mindful
"All sustaining happiness [and] all sustaining resilience rests on mindfulness: the ability and the practice of becoming quiet without self-judgement. In whatever form is helpful for you (meditation, prayer, yoga, tai chi, mindful running) mindfulness practice creates calm, a sense of well-being, increases self-esteem and bolsters creativity and ingenuity," says Sirois. Instead of trying to find the answers from your environment, search within yourself to find the guidance you need when things aren't going as planned.
8. Take A Look At The Big Picture
While being present can be a good thing, it can be easy to get lost when you're just focusing on the negative. Look to the future and envision how you want to view yourself, and this can realign your thoughts and allow you to stay positive in a negative situation. "If you relax and look at the big picture, [you] can remember why [you] started this action rather than getting lost in the details that [you] don't like. Remember the end goal and get creative with ways to achieve it. You have the power to change your perception on the event so use this as a challenge that allows you to be creative," says founder of Performance Life Coaching Stephanie Holland.
9. Work With A Friend
Sometimes it's best to talk with a buddy who may understand exactly what you're going through. Ask if they would like to join your journey so you both can keep each other motivated. "It's easy to want to give up before you see results because it takes time. Try enlisting an accountability buddy to help you stay on track. It's a lot easier to wake up at 6am for that workout if you have a friend meeting you downstairs. Having a responsibility to someone else works magic in terms of how productive you are," says Tandon.
10. Embrace Change
Instead of fighting against the current, embrace change for the positive lessons it can bring into your life. "Change is the only constant. So the sooner you embrace this notion, and accept change as your greatest teacher and friend, the more easeful life will feel. Then you can get on with doing the work at higher and higher levels," says Tandon.
11. Don't Give Up
Whatever you do, don't give up. A lot of people tend to do this way too early because the work was harder than they were expecting. But if you continue to push forward and pick yourself up, hopefully your dreams and ambitions will come to life. According to the Huffington Post, author of How to Quit Working: A Simple Plan to Quit Your Job for a Life of Freedom Jeff Steinmann said, "Be aware that your action in this moment right now — staring down that big, ugly obstacle in front of you is where your success or failure is determined. Whether you figure out a way past it, or let it defeat you is the determining factor. So, when that obstacle is staring you in the face, be excited about getting an opportunity to defeat it."
Life is never going to be perfect, but if you embrace the good with the bad, you can truly appreciate those awesome times when everything does go smoothly.