For some ridiculous reason, we as a society are not buzzing about some of the best celebrity news all week: DJ Khaled and his fiancée Nicole Tuck are expecting! This is a major key alert, folks. This is the most blessed up, "We The Best"-branded announcement to every come from the Khaled camp. Never mind all the keys or big hits DJ Khaled gifts to us on a regular basis. The thought of a mini-Khaled running around Miami and demanding apple juice from Puff Daddy should warm the cockles of all our hearts.
Undoubtedly, Khaled and Tuck will be inundated with a ton of advice and pregnancy hacks for their impending parenthood. It seems everyone is an expert these days, but should this perfect couple really listen to all the chatter? Not. at. all. You know why? Because the Papa Khaled has built a whole career on giving his adoring fanbase a ton of sage wisdom through his Snapchat. It seems that he has all the answers to living the best life possible and that's a big indicator he's ready for parenthood. What are some of the best pieces of advice that Khaled can pass onto his child? Well, that's a good question indeed. If I may be so bold, here are some of the best pieces of advice that baby Khaled can learn, as told to us by DJ Khaled himself.
1. Good Hygiene Is Paramount
A clean back is a happy back. It also allows for less wind resistance when you have to whip around and confront those who are sneaking up on you.
2. Never Miss A Chance To Have Some Fun
Just because your childhood goes quickly doesn't mean you have to grow up. At least not when it comes to doing donuts in a motorized grocery cart.
3. Take Time To Appreciate Natural Beauty
Bees are honestly a major key (start reading up now, baby Khaled!) and your dad understands they make nature extra beautiful.
4. It's OK To Be A Show Off
Fitness is an important part of staying on top. Make sure to follow in your dad's footsteps so you can unlock your true potential.
5. Curfews Are Good For Kids
There's a reason you're getting ordered to bed so early. School is a major key and your parents know a good night's sleep = success.
6. No Games, No Worries
Just like your pops says, "Don't ever play yourself." Short, simple and powerful.
7. Confidence And Power Go Hand-In-Hand
Take pride in what you've built, revel in your success and make sure to shout it from the rooftops. Don't worry, your dad will show you how it's done.
8. Stay Patient
Even if you have to patiently wait for him to finish a thought.
9. Always Take A Moment To Appreciate All Things Drake-Related
You'll learn very quickly just how important Drake is to any well-rounded music library, as well as is finding your happy place. If you're lucky, you may even get to meet him with a hook-up from your dad.
10. Just Keep Moving Forward
Stay on the path and you'll find your success (and maybe a lion along the way to keep you motivated).
11. Your Parents Are One Tight-As-Hell Duo
Never forget to show some love to your parents, baby Khaled. It's been clear from day one they are ride-or-die for each other, so you're in good hands.
I legitimately think that the next nine months are going to be full of amazing pre-fatherhood snaps and baby bump watches from DJ Khaled. If his Snapchat history is anything to go by, I'm expecting tons of wisdom and humor. Bring it on!