I'm pretty close with my parents. Even though I moved out of the house nearly a decade ago, I still talk to them all the time and go home often. And in my head, some part of me always thought I was doing my parents a favor by visiting them. I'm like "OK, fine, I'll grace you with my presence and eat all of your leftovers and monopolize the remote control all weekend." I think they're so happy to see me and have my ace vibes in the house that they don't mind the mess and the crumbs and the surprise guests.
It's only recently been brought to my attention that my presence isn't always sunshine and sprinkles. Apparently, my parents have established quite a system for themselves, in their child-less nest, and when I come home with random friends, half-interested boyfriends, and a dirty laundry sack rivaling Santa's present sack, they're, like really annoyed with me. Turns out, being an adult does not shield you from being a pain in the butt. It actually makes your parents have higher standards for you!
If you frequently visit your parents and ransack their home, chances are, they're pretty annoyed with you, too. The are 14 ways you don't realize you're being an annoying adult child:
Using Their Personal Products
To me, it never seems like a big deal. But to my mom, it's horribly invasive and pesky. Whenever I go home, I love to root through her drawers and test to her facial creams and oils. When she realizes that her things have been touched and moved and tested, she goes ballistic.
Screwing With Their Organization
It might not seem like your parents have a serious organizational system, but whatever it is, to them, makes sense. When you go home and put things back where you parents think they don't belong, they feel like their house is being invaded by looters.
Calling To Vent Constantly
I used to call home every time I was angry or sad or annoyed. I'd talk my mom's ear off for 45 minutes, until I felt like I had sufficiently vented, and then I'd hang up. Parents like to help, they don't like to be punching bags for their adult children. It helps to ask how their day is going, too.
Bringing Home Unserious Partners
My parents get easily attached to my partners. They hate it when I bring someone home I'm not serious about. They don't want to waste the time getting to know someone who is going to disappear or break my heart in a few weeks.
Doing Anything Unannounced
Parents have a way of living their lives now that they don't revolve around yours. If you just show up or try to surprise them with anything, they get uncomfortable. My parents in particular have become very set in their ways since I moved out of the house. Surprise guests are a no-go.
Discussing Their Age
Once they actually start to get old, it's no longer funny to make fun of them for, well, being old. Now it's a touchy subject. Avoid it unless you really want to annoy and upset them.
Questioning Their Memory
All parents are worried about losing their marbles. If you really want to make them freak out, mess with a story and blame it on their memory. Only, don't do that, because it's really mean ... and if you do decide to do it, be a decent human and put it on YouTube.
Ordering Too Many Movies
I'm just enough of a deadbeat that I wait for movies I want to see to come on demand so that I can charge them to my parents' account. When I was younger, they let it slide. Now that I'm an adult, it drives them crazy ... only, they don't find out until after I've watched the movie.
Leaving Lights On
When I was younger and left lights on in rooms I wasn't in, they would just shut them off. Now that I'm an adult and expected to understand things like electricity bills, I'm in for a serious yelling if I leave lights on.
Eating Their Food Without Asking
When your an adult, your parents are no longer going to the grocery store with you in mind. So if you show up at their house and start eating whatever you want — a bite of this pickle, a handful of this cold pasta, a lick of this pudding — they get pissed. And hangry.
Brining Your Laundry Home
It's not like I go home solely to do my laundry. But at the same time, it's not like I'm going to waste a trip home and *not* do my laundry. This drives my parents crazy.
Drinking Their Wine
When you were a teenager, you got in trouble for drinking their wine because laws. When you're an adult, you get in trouble for drinking their wine because it's their wine. Get your own.
Making A Mess In The Kitchen
I could be washing an apple, making a carrot cake from scratch or roasting a whole pig. It doesn't matter what I'm doing in the kitchen — if I'm doing anything, it's stressing them out.
Making Your Problems Their Problems
One of the best parts about being empty nesters as parents is supposed to be that you get time to yourself and a break from running your children's lives. But if you're an adult and you still rely on your parents to help you figure out every parking ticket, every job interview, every relationship issue and every hangnail, they're going to get really frustrated with your relationship really quickly. The greatest gift an adult child can give to their parents is to act like an adult. Even if you have to fake it.
Images: New Line Cinema, Giphy