'Real World: Ex-Plosion': Pregnancy is pretty real

I’ve spent a lot of time this week — too much time, inarguably — watching reality television in which otherwise charming gentlemen revealed to the women in their lives that they sort of suck. On Monday and Tuesday, that was The Bachelor’s Juan Pablo, who couldn’t offer much more than a series of “it’s okay”s to a woman trying to have a genuine conversation with him about respect and communication. That woman, Andi, smartly left of her own accord. And tonight it was The Real World: Ex-Plosion’s Cory who… well, we’ll get to it. (I’m trying to hit 500 words.) Three being the trend, I’m thankfully stopped short of writing an entirely different article about how ashamed I am to be a man, but Juan Pablo and Cory have done the male sex no favors this week. Stop dragging us through the mud, guys.

Anyway — as we were informed last week, Lauren is pregnant. Pregnant pregnant. Which obviously requires she have some kind of conversation with Cory, her on-and-off sexual/life partner. Suffice it to say he didn’t take it too well. Immediately he’s on the defensive, upset by the fact that it’s probably not his as well as the fact that he’s gotta deal with it. And no — I can’t imagine being confronted with the news that your sort-of girlfriend is pregnant by another guy (probably is, anyway) thrills you. I wouldn’t handle it well.

Problem is that Cory refuses to even be there for this person he proclaims to love, and can’t bring himself to console her or — in some moments — look her in the eye. “Why would I be there for you?” he asks her directly. Umm… because she’s an incredibly important person to you? Add to that the fact that she was there for you during your own pregnancy scare a few years earlier, and the whole thing is that much more unsavory. “It never goes both ways between Cory and I.”

Cory dancing with randoms at the bar later that night — again, after Lauren finds out she’s pregnant — only fans the flames, encouraging Lauren to call RW producers the next morning to come talk to them both. And what a treat that is! Cory sets a pretty high bar for the conversation from the outset. “Who got hurt in this? Me.” HOO BOY. The producer, Raquel, tries to explain to Cory that pregnancy scare support should usually focus on, you know, the woman… but Cory has trouble with that.

Eventually Lauren makes the smart (only) decision she can and heads home to be with family. Thank God. MTV would have loved a Real World spin-off in which all 11 housemates helped raise the child, but sometimes logic prevails and we have to settle for a less salacious end. Good luck, Lauren.

Image: MTV