There’s no shortage of cheesy dance-themed ‘80s movies out in the universe, but only one of them features Carrie Bradshaw. Actually, false, Footloose has Sarah Jessica Parker in it too, but her best work is Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. It’s a movie that starts being eyeroll-worthy with the title itself, and then just goes hard from there. Seriously, the movie is worth a re-watch just for the many laughs you'll get out of it alone; it is peak entertainment, you guys, and a pop culture staple.
Goody-Goody Janey dreams of being on Dance TV, but her strict Army Dad forbids her for partaking in any nightlife. The good news is that her rebellious friend Lynne encourages her to follow her heart and compete. The better news is she gets paired with natural talent/dreamboat Jeff as semi-finalist contesters. The bad news is that some weird poodle who walks on her hind legs and owns a Lexus rigged the whole competition. Will Janey really be able to make it on Dance TV, or are these obstacles simply too large to overcome?
Anyway, yeah, it’s basically Hairspray meets Dirty Dancing meet a bowl of Velveeta. Oh, and with a tiny Shannen Doherty, too. So, scroll down and enjoy all the delightful ridiculousness in Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.
1. Every Young Girl's Dream
Who didn't bring in pictures of themselves that they could paste over Eddie Van Halen during the middle of the school week? Actually, I was joking at first, but I think this is the humble origins of Photoshop right here.
2. Just In Case You Weren't Sure It Was The '80s
Here is a group of people dressed like a pack of Fruit Stripe gum.
3. Lynne Has A Skirt That Converts From Pleated Plaid To PVC
Somebody's having an adventurous time at Hot Topic.
4. "Come To This Stranger's House And Watch TV With Me, She'll Be Cool With It"
I get the feeling that this Lynne is a bastion of responsibility.
5. "She's Got A 25 Inch TV!"
6. Oh Great, It's The Football-Themed Episode Of Dance TV
I was really hoping these outfits could get exponentially more ridiculous.
7. A Moment Of Silence For This Once Edible Pizza Pie
How can you let this happen to such a beautiful thing?
8. Lynne Is Wearing Legit Plastic Dinosaurs On Her Head
9. This Overgrown Poodle Wants To Win The Dance Competition For Reasons I Can't Quite Fathom
Her hair, though. Nor can I understand why her owners got her a room and a dog bed with silk sheets.
10. Also, How Does This Poodle Own The Cher Horowitz Rotating Closet?
Usually some squeak toys and a few milk bones are more than enough.
11. "Do You Mind That I'm Punk? Well, It's Outrageous. I Mean, It's Not As Cool As New Wave, But It's Better Than Pre-Teen"
I'm sorry, I can't even listen to this over that screaming hot pink t-shirt... oh, and I guess the hot pink sideburn blush, too.
12. Babe, You Got A Little Something There
Yeah, just... don't move, I don't think it's anything serious, there just might be something on your hat.
13. Meanwhile, She's Just Showing Up With A White Fur Coat In The Middle Of What Looks Like Spring
Girls just want to have fun.
14. Janey's Hand-Over-Foot Acrobatics Win Her A Finalist Spot
Jeff just spins in circles for a while, because he's moderately attractive and the world is unfair.
15. This Bullet Belt And Coon-Skin Hat Combo
Like if Madonna had a lovechild with Davey Crockett.
16. These Punks' Elation At Being Invited To a 17-Year-Old Poodle's Debutante Ball
Finally, an opportunity to break out their new tux and spats.
17. JK, They Just Show Up In Droves To Trash This Banquet Hall
It doesn't seem like there's any huge repercussions on their end, tho.
18. Plenty Of Synchronized Dancing
Which is very, very punk.
19. Janey Teaches Jeff 10 Years Worth Of Acrobatics In The Time Frame Of One Montage
She is the Johnny Castle to his Baby Houseman.
20. "Oh, God. I Forgot I'm Grounded. Zach, What Am I Going To Do?"
I'm not sure if the 8 year old has any masterful plans, but putting on pants would be a good start.
21. This Seems Lightly Dangerous
Spoiler: the film does not end with her falling from three stories and cracking her head open.
22. The Shock And Awe Faces Janey's Parents Make When They See Her On TV...
... with a guy wearing a crop top. I would just disown her right now.
See? You need to add this to your dance movie repertoire right now, guys. You're really missing out.
Images: New World Pictures (25)