Entertainment
'Scandal' & 6 Other Shows With Storylines So Ridiculous You Won't Be Able to Tell Which Ones We Made Up — QUIZ
It happens to me all the time. A friend asks me to catch them up on what they missed on last week's Pretty Little Liars or The Vampire Diaries and I find myself saying sentences I never thought I would ever form. "Oh, you know, this week, Hanna was attacked in the dentist's office by A who planted a threatening message inside of her mouth. It was a pretty uneventful episode." What's worse is trying to explain a complex, totally bizarre show like Once Upon A Time to a non-viewer. I mean, there are only so many times that you can say,"The curse stopped time! They were in another dimension where time moves differently!" when someone asks how it's possible for Ginnifer Goodwin to have given birth to Jennifer Morrison.
It's hard to know what line our beloved TV shows won't cross in the name of plot. Can you tell the three real storylines from the fake one? Click through to find out.
Image: ABC Family
'Pretty Little Liars'
A. In a flashback, we learn that Melissa Hastings accidentally made out with her secret half-brother. (Whoops!)
B. The ever-evil A locks poor Emily in a wooden box and chains her to a buzz saw.
C. Spencer gets rejected from UPenn after A sends evidence of Spencer cheating on her SATs to the Ivy League school.
D. Hanna learns that the detective that her mother slept with in order to keep Hanna’s shoplifting habit under wraps could have been the one who got her dead (15-year-old) friend pregnant.
Image: ABC Family
Answer
C. Spencer did get rejected from UPenn but A didn’t have anything to do with it. Unless you consider that tracking down an omnipresent stalker might cut in to your studying time and extracurricular activities…
Image: ABC Family
'Once Upon A Time'
A. Emma, our heroine, goes on a date with Pinocchio.
B. Peter Pan — who is evil — kidnaps Henry, Emma’s son. Also, Peter Pan is Henry’s great grandfather, despite looking, oh, 14.
C. Mulan falls in love with Sleeping Beauty’s beau, Prince Phillip. (But still has way more chemistry with Aurora herself.)
D. The Evil Queen plans to wage a war on the Big Bad Wolf, only to realize that they are actually twins separated at birth.
Image: ABC
Answer
D. Nope, the Evil Queen doesn’t have a canine sibling (that we know of, at least). On Once Upon A Time, the Big Bad Wolf is actually a woman — and she’s Little Red Riding Hood herself.
Image: ABC
'Glee'
A. Kurt gets cast at the Tin Man in a production of the Wizard of Oz on Broadway, only to realize he has an allergy to the silver makeup and must forfeit the part. His fiancee, Blaine, snags the part instead, nearly leading to the couple’s breakup.
B. During his junior year of high school, Sam becomes a stripper whose stage name is “White Chocolate.”
C. Rachel finds her long lost mother, who turns out to be a show choir director whose group is competing with the New Directions. Rachel’s mother then adopts the baby of New Directioners Puck and Quinn.
D. Kitty sews Marley’s Grease costume tighter so that Marley will think she’s gaining weight, then teaches Marley how to purge her food for absolutely no personal gain.
Image: Fox
Answer
A. This did, however, happen to Ray Bolger during the filming of the 1939 film.
Image: Fox
'The Following'
A. A follower kidnaps Ryan Hardy’s beloved dog and refuses to give him back until Ryan releases important FBI documents.
B. Two (mostly) straight followers pretend to be a gay married couple for three years in order to appear friendly and innocent towards a woman whom Joe Carroll wants to kill.
C. Ryan Hardy gets kidnapped, and a follower uses magnets in order to torture him and mess with his lifesaving pacemaker.
D. Joe Carroll fakes his own death by killing his father’s illegitimate son and quickly pulling a bait-and-switch of the body.
Image: Fox
Answer
A. Like this show would trust Ryan Hardy with a dog.
Image: Fox
'The Vampire Diaries'
A. The most powerful witch in the world and last season’s big bad, Silas, is an exact copy of vampire Stefan. His girlfriend is an exact copy of Elena Gilbert, which puts our Nina Dobrev count at 3.
B. Upon learning that all of his friends are vampires, witches, werewolves, or some hybrid of the above, Matt decides that he wants a taste of the supernatural life and forces his ex-girlfriend to turn him into a vampire.
C. Damon secretly and systematically murdered the family of one of Elena’s only new friends at college. Elena forgives Damon for this within twenty minutes.
D. Katherine takes over Elena’s body and exactly none of her friends notice the difference.
Image: The CW
Answer
B. His only supernatural power is looking supernaturally hot in a tux.
Image: The CW
'Scandal'
A. Olivia Pope learns that she is pregnant with Fitz’s love child, and must keep it a secret from her Gladiators, Jake, and, of course, Mellie. She does so by going up a size in white cashmere coats.
B. The President learns that a member of the Supreme Court helped rig his election — and then tried to have him assassinated — so he smothers her with a pillow.
C. Papa Pope faked his wife’s death via plane crash in order to protect Olivia from the truth: that her mother was an international terrorist.
D. Cyrus secretly has the President’s former mistress killed; is never discussed again.
Image: ABC
Answer
A. But we’re sure that they’ll get to that fairly soon.
Image: ABC
'True Blood'
A. Jason is kidnapped by a group of inbreeding werepanthers who want to use him as a breeder.
B. Sookie learns that her blood — which is part faerie — can help vampires walk in the sun.
C. Bill drinks the blood of Lillith, but instead of dying, becomes an unkillable, all-powerful, evil vampire-type creature.
D. Hoyt becomes the leader of a werewolf tribe after showing great bravery in the face of evil.
Image: HBO
Answer
D. Ha, no.
Image: HBO
