Let The 'Gilmore Girls' Encourage Your Inner Slob

by Amy Roberts

As a writer, I understand the perils of procrastination all too well. Sometimes it doesn't matter how much I'd love to be working on a project, or how inspired I am by it, or how much I'm enjoying it, because, ultimately at some point, I'll find myself staring at an empty screen and thinking "Pah, a couple of hours on the couch with Netflix and some snacks and then I'll make a start on this." As you might expect from a show in which the central characters worship television and the healing powers of junk food, there are countless of Gilmore Girls quotes about being lazy that will empower you to unleash your inner slob without a single shred of guilt.

Because I think we all know that those couple of hours can sometimes extend into an entire day and, before you know it, you're buried into the sofa cushion, surrounded by crumbs, feeling like hell for having had so much fun doing absolutely nothing. Well, it's time to stop this guilt trip, ladies. I have just the ticket to help you out. Whether you're currently avoiding writing up an essay for school, going to the gym, tidying up, or even just contemplating ditching work for the day so you can re-watch season two of Gilmore Girls for the tenth time, take heart.

The Gilmore girls understand exactly where you're coming from, and they're here to help.

1. When A Workout Just Doesn't Seem Worth It

What kind of a glow can a gym provide that an entire day dipping nachos into flaming hot salsa can't?

2. When You're Overwhelmed By Efforts To Be A "Grown Up"

So you're saying that I have to meet deadlines, get to work on time, pay rent, not spend my bill money on cocktails, and be responsible and stuff? Pass. Kick back and relax for a while; you deserve it.

3. The Procrastinator's Golden Rule

That essay you were supposed to have completed by next Friday will totally write itself on Thursday night, right? Just what I thought. Eight hours of Netflix, an extra large pizza, and a duvet castle it is then.

4. When Someone Tries To Remind You That You've Kind Of "Got Commitments" To Uphold

Back off, buddy. I'm comfortable.

5. That Moment You Realize You Can Still Pretend To Be Working While Slobbing Around The House

What did we ever do before smartphones allowed us to send brief "my internet is limited right now because I'm about to go through a tunnel" emails while making snack stops between the kitchen and the bedroom?

6. When Procrastination Suddenly Makes You A Expert On Gourmet Cuisine

Now, all you need to figure out is how to obtain this incredible cheeseburger without having to leave the couch.

7. Those Times When Your BFFs Help To Excuse You From Your Responsibilities

"It was heart breaking, Mary, she was just sitting there on the couch grimacing into an empty bag of Skittles."

8. Your Response When Someone Tells You That They Spend 80 Percent Of Their Working Day Simply Spinning In Their Office Chair

Hello, soulmate.

9. When You Put Yourself Under House Arrest To Avoid Humanity

This is a social phenomenon which needs exploring; people definitely become stupider and harder to tolerate en masse and all at once.

10. That Almighty Epiphany: Being Lazy Doesn't Mean That You Haven't Achieved Anything

Build yourself a trophy out of food wrappers and crumbs, honey. You're a hero.

11. When You Realize That Your Life Goals Don't Line Up With Your Work Goals

Is there a way that I can make money while combining the two?

12. When Your Roommate Is Busy Working And You Want To Show That You Feel Bad

But, secretly, it took you two hours to reply to her text message because you were having too much fun doing nothing.

13. When You Receive An Amazing Opportunity Right In The Middle Of A Dessert Spree

"Listen, could you call me back in about two hours? I'm at the dentist... yeah, that's why I sound so strange. Nothing to do with having a mouth full of pudding, like, at all."

14. All The Damns You Give When Your Roommate Comes Home To Find You Napping At Two In The Afternoon

It is, thanks.

15. When You Realize That The Secret To A Happy Life Is Setting Achievable Daily Goals For Yourself

Let me just go and add that task to my bullet journal.

16. When You Return To Whatever It Was You Were Avoiding And Use Your Rage As Motivation To Get It Done

Never take a woman away from her cookies unless it's some sort of emergency.

So, to all you lazy procrastinators who are putting off that essay, novel, work shift or gym session, this is for you: eat pizza, be snuggly and Netflix the hell out of your day, and don't feel a single moment of guilt for it.

Images: Warner Bros. Television (3); lukesdiner/Tumblr (14)