The 9 Most Sinful Dishes in New Orleans Because We’re Not Kidding About Fat Tuesday

New Orleans may be a lot of things — a party haven, a foodie capital — but one thing’s for sure: you can always count on the good people of N’awlins to go big or die trying. Because when it comes to stuffing your face, the Big Easy does not mess around.

On this fattest of Tuesdays, we’re paying tribute to the most heart-stopping, gut-busting dishes in NoLa. Laissez les bon temps rouler, y’all.

Wake and Bacon

Start the day off right with a glorious Maple Bacon Long John from Blue Dot Donuts. Smothered in sweet, sweet glaze and topped with crumbled bacon, this fluffy creation is pure heaven. And a triple bypass waiting to happen.

Image: Blue Dot Donuts/Facebook

Just Like Mama Used to Make

At Mother’s on Restaurant Row, legend has it that one daredevil customer slapped some ham on his roast beef po’boy — and lo! The Famous Ferdi Special was born. Today, you can chow down on the hearty sandwich, loaded with ham, roast beef, and “debris” (NoLa-speak for renegade roast beef bits). It’s all slathered with gravy, Creole mustard, and mayo…you know, just in case you thought this was going to be a light lunch.

Image: Mother's Restaurant/Facebook

Tchoup, Tchoup

This sundae from Creole Creamery is not for the faint of heart. A confection as big as its name is long, the Tchoupitoulas consists of eight scoops of ice cream, eight toppings, whipped cream, cherries, and wafers. See that sundae on the left? Yeah, that’s only the mini.

Image: Creole Creamery/Facebook

A Whole Lotta 'Letta

Don’t let its adorable name fool you: the iconic muffuletta at Central Grocery is anything but delicate. With over a pound of meat and a round loaf that’s 10 inches in diameter, this thing is a beast.

Image: Central Grocery/Facebook

When the Dosants Come Marching In

Meet the Dosant, NoLa’s ballsy answer to the Cronut. At the aptly-named Manhattanjack, owner Jack Petronella whips up his own croissant-donut hybrid that’s every bit as decadent as its New York counterpart.

Image: Manhattanjack/Facebook

Illegal Activity

Craving an afternoon snack? Drop by Izzo’s Illegal Burrito and pick up its namesake creation. Weighing in at three pounds, this epic burrito is stuffed to the brim with rice, cheese, and heartburn.

Image: Izzo’s Illegal Burrito/Facebook

Do the Doberge

Though it may sound like some rare species of NoLa bird, the Doberge is actually a mind-blowing, 11-layer cake slathered with pudding and encased in a fondant shell. Debbie Does Doberge is a local favorite.

Image: Debbie Does Doberge/Facebook

Upper Crust

We’ve heard tales of the Golden Opulence sundae at New York City’s Serendipity 3. It retails at a cool $25,000 — pocket change compared to the now-defunct Strawberries Arnaud in NoLa, which would have set you back four million dollars. At the eponymous Arnaud’s, strawberries were macerated in wine and topped with (what else?) a diamond ring.

Image: Arnaud’s/Facebook

NoLa Is Your Oyster

For only the bravest eaters, Acme Oyster House is home to the hallowed 15 Dozen Club, which is pretty much exactly like it sounds: you get 180 oysters, and you have to eat them. In under an hour. Oh, and you have to sign a medical waiver. Happy Mardi Gras!

Image: Acme Oyster House/Facebook