This Senator Ranted For Ages About Pokemon Go

Between Donald Trump's official nomination, even more accusations of alleged plagiarism against the Trump family, and the ruling that left the Alaska delegation steaming like king crabs, Tuesday was another dramatic night at the Republican National Convention. However, one convention attendee had his heart and mind focused on the real issues, the ones that the American people really care about — Pokémon. Utah Sen. Mike Lee ranted about Pokémon Go at the RNC, taking an unpopular stance on the game that's quickly become the most viral smartphone game ever.

"Let's talk about Pokémon for a minute," Lee told the Daily Dot from the convention floor in Cleveland. "I can't for the life of me figure out what is fun about Pokémon Go."

He continued:

No one has been able to explain it to me. I've had staffers, my children, neighbors, try to explain it to me, why it's fun. It is not a fun game. Maybe there's something in it that I'm missing, perhaps, but I'm trying. You don't stumble across any Constitutions in it. I even opened up Pokémon Go inside the Senate chambers, we're not supposed to do that, it's against the rules, but I was curious to see whether there were any points to be scored inside the Senate chamber — nothing. So I was disappointed about that, I thought maybe the Senate would become — what do they call it, a gym? Is that what it's called?

Lee's comments then digressed into a confusing tangent about Speaker of the House Paul Ryan's "rock hard abs," before he snapped out of his daydream and remembered the subject at hand. When asked whether he thought Ryan's real-life gym prowess would extend to the gyms in Pokémon Go, Lee responded: "The Pokémon gym is very different. I don't know whether Paul Ryan's P90X skills transcend into the world of Pokémon Go, that is a very different field. Now look, the guy has rock hard abs, the guy is physically fit. I'm sure there are rules to Pokémon Go; whether or not the rules to Pokémon Go have a different application inside the Republican National Convention, I don't know. The bottom line is, it's not a fun game. There's nothing about Pokémon Go that I find enjoyable."

Yes, good people of Utah, this is who you elected to serve your interests in the United States Senate. Your tax dollars are putting put to good use to on Capitol Hill, teaching senators how to use an smartphone game. Now, that open Supreme Court seat seems to make a lot more sense.

Though Lee espouses that he doesn't understand what's so fun about the game, he essentially disproved his own point by admitting that he opened it in the Senate chambers. Pokémon Go is wildly addictive and half the fun is seeing where there are gyms, Pokéstops, and Pokémon around. As much as he said he didn't like the game, I have a sneaking suspicion that he's hunting for a Clefairy somewhere in Cleveland right now.