Throughout your 20s, you'll find that you say you're "sorry" a lot. You'll say it when you're wrong, you'll say it when you make a mistake, you'll say it when you trip and you'll say it people bump into you. You'll say it to make peace, you'll say it to seek reassurance, you'll say it to emotionally connect. You'll say it when you mean it and you should, and you'll say it when you don't mean it and you don't know what else to say.
Socially, we're quick to take on fault even when it's inaccurately placed. Saying "sorry" is a tool we use to smooth things over and make an interaction easier for us and the people around us. But sometimes the things that we say "sorry" for are not worthy of an apology.
A lot of what we experience in our 20s are necessary growth spurts and pains and saying "sorry" creates a negative association around our actions. Sometimes it's good to own up to your actions, take credibility, and stand by what you've done. If you're not intentionally hurting or disrespecting people, you shouldn't have to apologize for who you are right now in your life. These are 12 things you should never apologize for doing in your 20s, because they're totally allowed, at least for now:
Breaking Up With Someone
You're young and you're unattached. Now is the time to get into relationships and get out of them if they're not working. It takes two to tango, so if you're unhappy, you're doing the both of you a favor by being brave enough to end it. If you're being true to yourself, you're doing the right thing and there's nothing to apologize for.
Saying "No" To Plans
Take time for yourself when you need it. Don't ever feel pressure to go out because you're young. Go out when you want to and stay in and take care of yourself when you don't. Now is the time to learn about making choices that are right for you.
Cutting Out Friends
Some friends who made sense in your life in your late teens and college years might no longer be a good fit for you. If you think that you have toxic friendships weighing you down, don't feel bad about cutting those friends loose. It will only get harder when you get older. Be mature and polite about it, but don't be sorry for doing what's best for you.
Changing Your Career Goals
Always follow your dreams and your gut. If a company or a mentor spent a lot of time teaching you how to do a certain trade but you've decided your heart is elsewhere, leave and don't apologize. Just make sure you thank the people who put time into you. At the end of the day a company would rather have people who are living their dream, rather than people who are always looking out the window.
Taking A Time-Out
Sometimes you just need to unplug or take off some time from your life. Go to Europe, go off the grid, spend a few days not responding to emails. It's good to spend some time with yourself and you don't need to apologize for leaving your friends or family out of it. Sometimes we need to get away to find our best self and in the end that's always better for everyone else.
Experimenting Between The Sheets
This is your life and you get to spend it with whoever you want. If you want to try out relationships with different kinds of people that you haven't previously been intimate with, go ahead. Explore your heart, explore your sexuality. Try on all the different sizes, see what works for you — just make sure you're always honest with your partners.
Changing Your Style
Unless your office has a strict dress code, don't ever apologize for hanging on to your personal style. If your clothes make you happy and you feel well-defined, the people around will have to take it or leave it. Always dress for yourself and never change your clothes for anyone else.
Having An Opinion
People will tell you that you're too young and inexperienced to have a strong opinion. People generalize. If you feel passionate about something and have spent time learning about it and understanding it, feel free to stand behind it, no matter how many people tell you that you don't have enough life experience to do so.
Sending Food Back
This might sound simple in comparison, but if your food's not good, send it back. Be kind, be clear, and send it back. Know what you want and know how to stand up for yourself. Start by sending back food that's undercooked, speckled with human hair, or inedible.
For Loving Someone
Your heart wants what it wants — just like Selena's. Sometimes the people you love will not be loved by the other people in your life. You can listen to their concerns, hear them out, but don't ever say sorry for loving someone. It's your right to give your heart to anyone.
For Someone Else
Don't apologize for your friends. Now's the time to learn how to let each other stand on your own feet. Don't take the rap for your friends, that's not your job. And if you constantly feel like you have to apologize for the people around you, you might want to rethink the people you surround yourself with.
For Being Honest
Sometimes honesty is not well-received. Don't ever say you're sorry if you're telling the truth. It's good to get in the habit of being a brave honest friend in your 20s. Establish yourself as the type of friend who's incredibly trustworthy and live up to it everyday.