A Charter With The 'Below Deck' Crew Will Cost You

From Lifestyles Of The Rich & Famous to MTV Cribs, TV viewers have always been fascinated by fancy houses, crazy-big yachts, and the contents of famous people’s fridges. In that vein, a whole new season of Below Deck is on deck (sorry, had to) on Bravo, and the previews already have me dreaming of winning the lottery and getting my very own yacht to cruise around the British Virgin Islands with. But how much does it cost to charter the Valor, Below Deck 's new yacht? Let’s just say that I’ll need to really hit the lottery hard to have a chance of taking out that bad boy.

According to Yacht Charter Fleet, the Valor, which was previously named BG, is 154-feet long, sleeps up to 12 guests, and has a crew of 10. Built in 1990 and completely refitted in 2015 in a “Hampton-style” interior, the Valor offers “the very best in amenities and lounging options.” And it can be all yours for the low, low price of €140,000 per week, or $158,000 per week, plus expenses. Chump change, right?

While I’m not going to be renting a yacht for a week at that cost (I think I could afford a rowboat, maybe), a gal can dream, so here’s what I would do with the new cast of Below Deck on my British Virgin Island adventure.

Make Ben Whip Up Luxe Meals Just For Me

Ben, the resident chef on Below Deck, has plenty of experience with picky eaters on the yacht. Lucky for him, I am the opposite of picky — I eat everything. I would want him to whip me up complicated, luxurious meal so I can dine while overlooking the crystal blue waters of Tortola and think about how fabulous I am.

Ask Kate To Iron My Most Wrinkled Pieces

I am really great with doing laundry — it’s a chore I don’t mind — but I am pretty hopeless at ironing. It’s the bane of my existence. Sure, I can manage to make a t-shirt look unwrinkled, but if there is anything with seams or pleats or starch, it’s an ugly mess and I end up having it dry cleaned. Kate, however, presses all of her stew uniforms and she always looks like a million bucks, so if I were on the Valor, I might bring some of my laundry just so she can put her trademark creases on my pants.

Chill Out With Captain Lee

The captain doesn’t really fraternize with the guests on the yacht, save for a cocktail or two, but I want to sit with Captain Lee and pick his brain about all of his life experiences. You know that the guy has seen more than his fair share of crazy places and faces, and I want to hear all about his life on the water. I also want to talk about his favorite and least favorite Below Deck crew members — what he really thinks about them.

Like I said, my wallet is a little thin right now to be chartering a yacht like the Valor, but if I ever manage to save up $158,000, I think a week with the Below Deck crew would be well worth it.

Images: Virginia Sherwood/Bravo; Giphy (3)