13 Modern Quotes That Would Have Made Amazing Away Messages In The '90s

Despite the fact that I pretend to be a well-balanced and emotionally stable adult, I still enjoy a lot of the same moody outlets that I did when I was a teenager. I still like sad folk music, and I still like reading torrid love stories, and I often find myself thinking, "Damn, this would make a great away message". Most of my books are filled with highlighted sentences. My journals have tons of lyrics scrawled in them. Even though we don't use AOL Instant Messenger anymore, and even though we're never really "away" anymore, I have an urge to share these little tidbits with my social network.

Making something your status on Facebook is a little aggressive. And unlike our modest buddy lists, our Facebook networks reach out to thousands of people. There was something safe and pleasant about an away message. It was just available for your close friends. You could post an inside joke. Your scheduled whereabouts for the day. A momentary frustration. It was so casual and candid — we weren't concerned with being on-brand, and we weren't thinking about how everything we say on the internet shapes how people see us off the internet. So because I can't make these my away messages, I thought I'd share them with you. These are 13 of my favorite should-be-away-messages that I've cataloged in case AIM comes back to life.

"I'd be happy as hell if you stayed for tea."


A gorgeous lyrics from the song "GOD" on Bon Iver's latest album.

"I'm underneath your tongue."

Another pretty lyric from Bon Iver, this is from the song "8 (circle)".

"Let me photograph you in this light in case it is the last time that we might be exactly like we were."


A lyric from Adele's song "When We Were Young".

"Life a continuous backing away from the edge."

A quote from the book The Girls , by Emma Cline.

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“Lust rubied my blood, gave me the gait of an uncaught criminal, and I felt like I could walk forever.”


A quote from the book Sweetbitter , by Stephanie Danler.

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"So, who do I want to be tomorrow?"

A quote from the book The Girl on the Train , by Paula Hawkins.

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"Oh, f*ck the paperwork"


A quote from the book Fifty Shades of Grey , by E.L. James.

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"We ain't ever getting older"

A lyric from the super catchy song "Closer" by The Chainsmokers.

"It's hard out there for a fuzzy little introvert."


A quote by the ever-hilarious Amy Schumer, in her book The Girl With The Lower Back Tattoo.

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"I am inimitable, I am an original."

A quote from everyone's favorite new musical, Hamilton .

"All my friends are heathens, take it slow."


A moody lyric from the song "Heathens," by the band Twenty One Pilots.

"Nothing to prove and I'm bulletproof and know what I'm doing."

Ariana Grande's sexy lyric from her song "Dangerous Woman".

"When we turn our heads to the left it means 'I love you more than anything in the world', and when we turn our heads to the right it means 'Watch out, we’re in danger'."


Quote from the movie The Lobster.

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Images: Giphy, Pixabay