If you're the type who gets hot and bothered by horror films and like your sexy with a bit of spooky (or vice versa), then this Halloween gift guide will help you get your adult trick or treat on. Whether it's because pearl-clutching prudery still pervades our cultural fabric and folks need an excuse to let loose, or because sex just sells, Halloween has become an increasingly sexy holiday. Historically, the celebration began as a pagan rite that marked the end of summer and the harvest and welcomed in the fallow period of winter and a chance to commune with the dead. Now, it's a chance for folks to let their freak flags fly, whether that means stripping down to Satanic skivvies or covering up in layers of costumery.
Implicit in all of this behavior is fantasy fulfillment. The ways we enjoy Halloween aren't too far off from the ways we enjoy sex. By day, you might be a mild-mannered office worker, but in bed — and on Halloween — you can be sultry ghoul, ravenous for pleasure (and maybe also a chocolate peanut butter pumpkin).
In this spirit, here are nine sexy/spooky items:
1. Blood Lube
Blood Lube, $10, Indiegogo
Period sex is fantastic, but what if you're sleeping with someone who isn't on their period — or never will be? Enter Blood Lube, a new sexual lubricant for vampiric lovers who want their sessions extra sanguine.
2. Nun Lingerie
The Nun Transparent Outfit, $205, Murmur
Tacky and cheap costumes abound, but French lingerie purveyor Murmur knows how to make Halloween high end. This sheer nun lingerie costume — as seen on Madonna — is a perfect way to role play blasphemy year round.
3. Demon Dildo
Demon Dick, Starting at $90, Bad Dragon
No one should be afraid of sex toys — unless they want to be, that is. A product of Kink.com and Bad Dragon, this "demon d*ck" was resurrected just in time for unholy action.
4. Cat Fetish Mask
Leather Mask, $69, Etsy
Instead of the usual "sexy cat" costume, add a splash of kink to your Catwoman look this season with a meow-worthy mask by Tavaron's Leather Stuff.
5. Zombie Fleshlight
Freaks: Zombie Mouth, $59, Flesh Light
Brave, penis-havers who are turned on by the fear factor might enjoy this Zombie Mouth Fleshlight from their "Freaks" series. Then again, I'd be afraid to stick anything between those teeth, particularly on a dark and stormy October night...
6. Pentagram Rosary Panties
Pentagram Rosary 666 Occult Gothic Thong, $85, Etsy
If there is one pair of panties that could bring Satan to his knees, it might be these by Diktator Fashion Lab. Her exquisite, hand made thongs are constructed out of real rosaries from The Vatican, which makes sense why it feels like the power of Christ is compelling me to buy a pair.
7. Dark Chocolate Penis
Chocolate Penis, $6, Climax Chocolates
Halloween is as much about tricks as it is treats. I refuse to spend my October 31 without tasting something sweet, and if that something happens to be a dark chocolate ganache-filled penis by Climax Chocolate, then so be it.
8. Erotic Pumpkin Carving Kit
Pornkins Carving Kit, $20
The hallowed practice of pumpkin carving initially began to ward of wandering spirits in the night. With Pornkins' erotic pumpkin carving kit, you're sure to ward of all kind of folks with your X-rated jack-off-lantern.
9. Elvira Perfume
Elvira's Zombie, Starting at $25, Demeter Fragrance
This spooky siren embodies everything sexy and scary, whether in her classic film, Elvira: Mistress of the Dark, or via her darkly seductive fragrances. Spritz a little of this into the air to embody one of TV's O.G. witch bad girls. (I wear Vamp everyday and it works like a charm!)
Hope your All Hallows Eve is as pleasurable as possible!
Images: Fotolia; IndieGoGo; MurmurClothing/Instagram; Bad Dragon; Tavaron's Leather Stuff; Fleshlight; Diktator Fashion Lab/Etsy; Climax Chocolate; Pornkins; demeterfragrance.com
