15 Ways You Know You're a True Marin County, California Local
Everybody knows what lies on the south side of the iconic Golden Gate Bridge — the city of San Francisco, glittering jewel that it is. But do you know what's on the northern side? Why, that would be Marin County, home to a sprawling landscape of windswept hills, striking beaches and lush forests, and the fifth-highest income per capita in the country. If you're lucky enough to have grown up in Marin, there are some things only you can really understand. Here are 15 ways to tell if you're a genuine Marinite.
You Were Confused the First Time You Saw a Billboard
That's right, we don't have a single one. Marin's county ordinance banning billboards actually predates the opening of the Golden Gate Bridge.
You Gotten Stuck In Traffic Caused By In-N-Out Burger
You've Hiked Where Star Wars Was filmed
Look alive, upper-middle class liberals. Somewhere, above you, in the giant Redwoods — the Ewoks lurk, biding their time.
You Expect County Courthouses To Look Like Vaguely Futuristic Palaces
Protip: don't let Frank Lloyd Wright design your Civic Center, even if it means it'll get to be in Gattaca . Rolling up to this place to pay a traffic citation can be a little terrifying.
You Went To High School With John Walker Lindh
The American Taliban himself is a product of Northern California's finest, Redwood High School. Go Giants! Bummer that I missed him by a few years, though — I could've tried to sell my yearbook to CNN.
You Know The Way to Bolinas Without Road Signs
For decades, the residents of this idyllic, rustic coastal hideaway have been tearing down each turnoff sign the highway department can throw at them. And cellular service being what it is, Google Maps is no guarantee. But you know the way, right? Here's a hint: start at the 2 A.M. Club.
You've Smoked Weed Near the Louis Pasteur Statue...
Lo and behold, stoners of the world — this is the very spot, at San Rafael High School, where "420" was born.
9. ...And You Know Exactly Where To Score Some.
If you ever decide to sell weed out of a KFC drive-thru at which you work, this is crucial: pick out a more intricate code order than "extra biscuits."
When You're Drunchy at Night, You Still Crave Denny's
If it's midnight on a Friday or Saturday, you already know the two places you have to eat, and which one is better. Any other day, and the choice is made for you — get your ass to Denny's.
You Recognize This Handsome Devil
Good lord, Corte Madera Town Center Thanksgiving food drive turkey! Has it really been 20 years? Why yes, it has.
Deciding Which Beach to Visit is an Existential Crisis
Stinson, Rodeo, Muir, Drakes, Heart's Desire, Limantour, Bolinas, Kirby Cove, McNears, Point Reyes — it's all a bit much to process. If you're not careful, you'll fritter away the day deciding.
When You See Someone Smoking, You're Shocked If It's Tobacco
Cuz we've got the lowest rate of smoking in the state, and the state has the second-lowest rate of smoking in the country. We also have no less than 11 medicinal marijuana delivery services.
You Looked Down on Hall Middle School Because it Smelled Like Sewage
Which was terribly unfair of you, because it only smelled that way, like, one month out of the year tops!
You Know That Novato Isn't Really Part of Marin
Okay, so technically it is, but come on. It hurts me too, but sorry.
Gotta love this place.