Working out can be an... emotional experience. Some days, I wake up with energy I can't wait to burn; other days, it's like I'm actually glued to my couch. And that's just getting there — once I'm at the gym, I can go from super confident to dying in the span of a mile. Thank god for people-watching, a gym's built-in entertainment system.
The thing is, I do like working out — I like how I feel afterwards, and honestly, I like how I look afterwards. But, sometimes, I hate the actual act of exercising. Anyone else who isn't an exercise addict probably understands where I'm coming from. And your stream of consciousness at the gym probably goes a little something like this:
I woke up like this.
I look amazing, I am going to kill it today.
Wow, this is fun! Just me?
Guys, this is fun! Why don't I do this more often?
Ummm, I really hope the person before me wiped down this machine.
Why is this bike seat wet?
How many episodes of Fashion Police can E! possibly air?
Seriously, these are always on.
I want to work out my butt, but I feel weird squeezing my cheeks in public.
Is this weird? Stop staring at me. I should probably go do abs...
But, hey, look at his butt.
I hope he's into sweaty, disheveled messes.
Can I get a tax break for staying in shape?
There has to be more to this than health benefits.
I definitely look better than that person...
OK, definitely not her. But maybe her...
Dude, I don't think you're doing that right.
It's only been 10 minutes?
How long do I have to stay here so people don't judge me when I leave?
Does this actually ever happen to anyone?
Please, god, don't let it happen to me.
Bathing suit season, bathing suit season.
63 days 'til summer...not that I'm counting.
How is it possible for one person to smell that bad?
And why did he have to choose the machine right next to me?
I used to be good at this.
I used to be captain of my sports team. What happened to my life?
Is it appropriate to work out in just my sports bra?
I'm not sweaty, I'm just dewy.
I'm so hot. I've literally never been this hot.
I think I actually might melt into a puddle on this treadmill. Haven't gyms heard of AC?
No, Pandora, I don't feel like listening to another commercial.
And no, I won't upgrade.
This must be what asthma feels like.
This is worse than running up the subway steps!
FML for choosing an unforgiving dress for that wedding next week...
What am I going to eat when I get home?
The options are endless...
Am I the only one that doesn't take steroids up in here?
Seriously, bro. You look ridiculous.
I am killing it right now. I look amazing.
Yeah, keep staring. You wish you were this hardcore.
Wait, why is that creepy guy staring at me?
Not a chance, buddy.
You didn't just seriously hit on me while I'm on the treadmill, did you?
Can't. Do. Any. More.
This is the worst idea I've ever had.
How is she not a sweaty mess?
And why don't I look like that when I work out?
Why is my hair so annoying right now?
Three ponytail holders and a headband, and it's still in my face.
I regret all those carbs I ate last night.
Actually, I take that back.
This is my jam!
And yes, I am aggressively lip-syncing.
How ridiculous do I really look right now?
One a scale of one to this guy...
Five more minutes — you got this!
I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...
I'm done! I made it!
I can take on the world right now!
Do I really have to walk home right now?
Main image: AntonioDiaz/Fotolia