EARLIER: It's nearly August. Which means we're just over one month away from the Sept. 4 premiere of It's Always Sunny on Philadelphia on FX's new network, FXX. Of course, since the only thing we love more than another helping of Sunny is a helping of rum ham, we've been feeling like this about a new Season 9 of Dennis, Dee, Charlie, Mac, and Frank:
Pretty damn pumped, especially knowing that we're locked in for a Season 10.
Spending the next two autumns of our lives in front of the TV like this?
Not a bad deal, regardless of the fact that we'll have to reset our DVRs to a new network. So here we are, sitting confident and pretty.
Until we see a Rolling Stone interview with Glenn Howerton, also known as the demented and disgusting Dennis. Which is great, because we love Howerton!
Until he tells us that Season 10 of Sunny will be its last. Wait — what?
There’s a certain point where you wear out your welcome and we don’t want to do that. We want to leave them wanting more. We spend a lot of time trying to find new lines to cross. We’re not trying to offend people or gross them out, but we’re looking to surprise them. I think we’re proud of what we’ve done so far, so it’s time to stop. I’m sure there are already a few people who are like "Jesus Christ is that show still on? Go away."
It hits us like a punt in the nuts.
Season 10 will be Sunny's last? It... it will end?
This is, of course, a major fail.
Yes, we still have two more seasons that will be tastier than a whole box of cat food, but we're already going through denial. After all, there's one thing in our favor: FX has yet to confirm Season 10 is the final season for the long-running series.
But unless we hear it's not the final season soon, we'll have no choice but to move on to anger...
Because, do you think we can move onto acceptance?
Never! So we have no choice but to cope with this terrible news the way we cope with every piece of terrible news. By cuddling up with Special Agent Jack Bauer...
Taking in enough dangerous toxins to help us pretend this isn't a reality...
And spending a full week watching nothing but It's Always Sunny reruns.
But if we eventually have to accept Howerton's words as reality...
We will celebrate the fact that It's Always Sunny has produced some of the best television comedy of the past decade.
So cheers, bitches.