Entertainment

Will She Buy The Clippers?

by Mallory Schlossberg

Now, I'm not a huge fan of sports, but I am a big fan of sports that involve celebrities. If you say the words "Oprah" and "basketball" together, I'm in. So, I'm in! Right now, a slew of celebrities want to buy the L.A. Clippers, since the ever-racist Donald Sterling is gearing up to sell the team. He's been banned from the NBA for life, which means it's an absolute must for him to rid himself of any attachment to the basketball team.

Celebrities took to Twitter with their very warranted disgust at Sterling's nasty racist remarks to his girlfriend (he has a wife, too, but that's besides the point). Racist comment will, of course, make the public denounce someone, but celebrities — although they may deplore Sterling — have taken a liking to the Clippers. After all, with Sterling leaving, the Clippers have an opportunity to rehabilitate their image, which could allow the team to potentially usurp the L.A. Lakers in their appeal, as the Lakers have always been the more successful, popular, and glamorous team. So, celebs want in!

While some celebrities only want a small stake in the Clippers, some want bigger chunks of the team. It's a matter of who's going to make the biggest bid.

So, who's expressed interest in adding "basketball team" owner to their resume? The AP reports that these A-listers are eyeing the potential to become an owner.

Oprah

What can't Oprah do? She's considering making a bid on the team, and spokesperson Nicole Nichols said in an email that Oprah, "is in discussions with David Geffen and Larry Ellison to make a bid for the Los Angeles Clippers should the team become available." Will the Clippers games also air on OWN, or will we get a special documentary called Clipper Wives with lots of tears? Oh please, I hope.

P. Diddy

"Hey, just callin' to put my bid in. What? You can't hear me? Ohh. 'Cause it's a shoe." Diddy's a Knicks fan, but he's said to express interest, too. And Diddy generally gets what he wants, 'cause he's Diddy and all that stuff. But still, if there's one person who can win anything and everything with her wisdom and ways, it's Oprah.

Matt Damon

Damon apparently only would want a small fraction of the Clippers, economically speaking. What is the math for that, you ask?

Snoop Dogg

And those are his feelings about Donald Sterling, by the way. He's a viable candidate to take a fraction of the team, and with those scathing remarks towards Sterling, he definitely wants the Clippers to be in better hands. Still, Oprah & Co. seem the most plausible to take all.

Rick Ross

Again, another fellow who'll likely want not the entire thing, but will still put out a bid for part of the team. But be warned, other bidders — this is a guy who sued LMFAO for saying they were shuffling (everyday), when Ross was hustling (everyday), and shuffling and hustling are not the same thing (everyday). He's someone who will get his way — unless you outbid him.

Frankie Muniz

Oh, don't do that again, Frankie! You suddenly became relevant again and entered our pop culture vernacular when you said that you wanted to buy the Clippers because. Wait. You didn't say you wanted to buy the Clippers. You made a statement:

So, okay, everyone. Back off and step aside. Malcom is no longer in the middle. He is on top, buying the Clippers.

Of course, it's going to be a game of "whoever has the most money" and Oprah seems the most plausible choice because, I mean, it's Oprah. Regardless, it looks like the team will soon be owned by someone a lot more likable (and GIF-friendly) than it currently is.

Image: Oprah GIF/Diddy GIF/Matt Damon GIF/Rick Ross GIF/Frankie Muniz GIF