These Dior Sandals Prove the Ugly Shoe Trend Really Needs to Die

I am making the official call: the ugly shoe trend needs to die. Stat. I'll be honest; I've always hated ugly shoes as "a thing" (sorry, Isabel Marant). They are not "ugly-chic" or "ugly-cool." They are "ugly-ugly." I'll take a buckled ankle boot or pristine ballet flat any day. But I've always been willing to let fans of normcore and the like have their fun. After all, the ugly sandal never hurt anybody.

But things have changed. Wednesday night, Dior held a Cruise 2015 presentation at the Brooklyn Navy Yard and debuted the ugliest shoes of all time on the runway. The. Ugliest. They have clunky black-and-white sneakers soles. They have a pink, black, burgundy, and white scarf acting as the sandal portion of the shoe. They are a monstrosity. And they do kind of hurt (to look at).

I would not let my worst enemy wear this shoe. It looks like a sad, culturally appropriative attempt at athletic geisha footwear, or a bizarre mom-shoe Walmart wants you to think is chic. I just can't anymore with the high-fashion ugly shoes, even if Gwyneth is into them for spring. They need to go away. No more Birkenstocks, no more Isabel Marant slip-on sandals, no more weird sneaker-stiletto-scarf hybrids. With this Dior concoction, I've hit my breaking point.

If you're not that into shoes, by all means, wear whatever you want. But do not spend big money on laughably hideous shoes. Not only do they make you look like a clown-footed psycho who got dressed in the dark, but they're mildly offensive. Some people can't actually afford to be choosey about their footwear. They might wear not-stylish shoes because they're cheap and comfortable enough to walk around in. So perhaps let's not mock that footwear with expensive versions.

I understand that you may not want to hobble around in Louboutins all the time just because you can afford them. That's great! There are plenty of comfy, chic shoes you can pick up. I hear this little brand called Chanel makes some cute quilted ones. But please, please skip the Birkenstocks by Celine/Margiela/whoever else is into ugly shoes these days. It's for your own good (and the good of my eyesight).

Images: elle_mexico/Instagram