How Mercury Retrograde is Ruining Your Love Life

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Reminder: Mercury is in retrograde until July 1st. As I’ve previously lamented, it has the potential to ruin what otherwise could have been a perfectly good June. We’ve covered how it’s best to avoid signing contracts (ahem MARRIAGE) or entering into a new, serious relationship during this time — Mercury Retrograde can make us feel a bit kooky, causing us to make decisions that we may not understand once the planet turns direct. It is also the zodiac's own cock-blocker — hard as you try, you may find that you just can't spit game like usual. You're being a bummer partner, a boring date, and an emotional ex.

On June 17th, Mercury backed out of Cancer and into Gemini on its continued retrograde cycle, but Mercury Retrograde has the same upper-cutting effect on our lives regardless of what house it’s floating through. However, the shift does create subtle changes in the way we experience it. If you know and love a Cancer, you know that the water sign is emotional, intimate and sensitive. June 7-17th was the more emotional, watery part of this Mercury Retrograde cycle. In your love life, you may have noticed teary arguments and make-ups, first date conversations that were more intimate that you’d normally get, and stronger emotional responses to rejection. Typically it’s no skin off your back if someone swipes left on Tinder, but for the past week and a half, you may have found that it left you feeling hurt.

During Mercury Retrograde in Cancer, you may have felt irrational; you may have found yourself revisiting old romantic conflicts for no apparent reason. An ex may pop into your mind. Whatever you do, don’t reconnect until Mercury goes direct! Heed this warning and save yourself the awkward pain of a second breakup with the same person when you realize that they still obsess over comic book adaptations. Or are vegan. Or only have one suitable shirt.

Now, for the remainder of Mercury Retrograde, the planet will be in Gemini, its home sign. Gemini is the zodiac's great communicator. Mercury Retrograde in Gemini is a communication disaster. You’ve spent the past few weeks reflecting on what you want in a partner. You’ve stocked up on safe sex supplies because after careful contemplation, you realize you really just want fun right now.

You may have re-designed your dating site profile (good for you! focus on those “re” words)! Stellar effort! In this case, however, communication is not key. Don’t make any announcements or big love life decisions. You may find that you feel the need to sit in a coffee shop and journal about a recent lovers’ quarrel, just to organize your thoughts. If you’re casually dating a few people, you may find that you’re seeing each of them in a new light. If you’re trying to narrow down or get serious, you’ll find yourself feeling enlightened with a fresh perspective on what you want.

Keep all these things in mind for the remainder of Mercury Retrograde, and watch out for these five potential romance mishaps between now and July 1.

1. Online

Your message on Okcupid didn’t go through. You swept right on Tinder when you KNOW you meant to swipe left (obviously). Your monthly J-Date payment wasn’t processed. Your hilarious Facebook chat banter is misinterpreted as rude.

2. When Co-habitating

You keep misplacing your partner’s keys. Your moods are off: one is cheerful when the other is melancholy. One’s feeling randy and the other is just sleepy. Your lease is up and you need to decide whether to renew or find somewhere new.

3. Romantic Travel

Travel sucks during Mercury Retrograde, and you may find that stupid arguments over how to spend time or what to order for room service put a damper on the whole experience. You didn’t know not to plan your honeymoon during Mercury Retrograde. Better luck next time….oh. Nevermind.

4. On a First Date

This person who seemed really witty and into Jenny Lewis and loves kids was great over text, but in person he’s just not getting you. You find that while you’re normally a chatterbox, you may have nothing to say and wish you were home watching Orange is the New Black with your cat.

5. Wedding Planning

Hopefully someone told you not to do this.

This is your Mercury Retrograde love song! Don’t feel like you’re only going backwards. But don’t leap forward either! Maybe just… stand still.