WTF Is Happening Here?

Sometimes, special things happen. The True Detective Season 1 bootleg DVD cover is one such special thing. Reddit user/angel/hero shake-and-bake shared a photo of the fake True D cover, and the photo has since made the Internet rounds. Understandable. It's a piece of art. And I cannot stop staring at it.

I'm tempted to make it my desktop wallpaper. My top concern: I doubt I'd get any work done if the beautiful pic was constantly on my computer screen. Because I’d spend all day looking at it.

Just because I love it doesn't mean I don't have any questions for the cover. I have questions. So, so many questions:

1. What is that bird?
2. Is that a phoenix?
3. Why is there a phoenix?
4. Is the phoenix The Yellow King?
5. Is the phoenix The Spaghetti Monster?
6. Is the phoenix a flat circle?
7. Do you remember when Rust Cohle and Marty Hart chased Errol Childress around the Luxor Hotel? Because I don’t.
8. Did I miss the Rust Cohle leather jacket episode?
9. Did I miss the Rust Cohle only tans his face episode?
10. Did I miss the Rust Cohle wears a v neck episode?
11. What’s that? That isn't Matthew McConaughey's body?
12. That's Brad Pitt's body?
13. But why?
14. No, seriously. Why?
15. How did that happen?
16. Who signed off on that?
17. Who signed off on any of this?
18. Did I miss the Las Vegas episode?
19. That’s Las Vegas, right?
20. When did Rust Cohle and Marty Hart go to Vegas?
21. Was their Vegas trip any fun?
22. Or is Rust Cohle when he's on vacation, too?
23. Who is the better gambler?
24. Rust Cohle is definitely the better gambler, yeah?
25. Can Rust Cohle count cards?
26. Doesn’t Rust Cohle seem like someone who could simultaneously count cards and share a parable?[Twitter Embed: https://twitter.com/HuffPostTV/statuses/481523436900982786]
27. Does Doge's pervy twin write for the Chicago Sun-Times?
28. Can we talk about the phoenix again?
29. What’s the debris surrounding the phoenix?
30. Is the phoenix molting?
31. This cover reminds me: Why didn’t this show feature more explosions?
32. Or was I grabbing a glass of water when all of the action movie-style explosions happened?
33. If I stare long enough into that flame behind Marty Hart, will I see a vortex?
34. Is that car flying in the air?
35. Are the people pictured in the bottom righthand corner of the tableau running from a tidal wave made out of fire?
36. Why is the cop in the bottom lefthand corner of the tableau so chill?
37. Does the cop in the bottom lefthand corner of the tableau see the tidal fire wave?
38. Will someone let the cop in the bottom lefthand corner of the tableau know what’s going on?
39. Should I screen-print this on a t-shirt?
40. Or would that t-shirt be too intense to wear outside of the house?
41. How long have I been staring at this?
42. Will I ever stop staring at this?
43. Is this going to be forever?
44. Is this Carcosa?
45. Why won't my eyes blink?
46. Will someone take my computer away from me?