Shelley Has A Saucy Strategy

Oh, Shelley. Thank you for saying what all of us were thinking during Sunday night’s Game of Crowns. (Well, it was what I was thinking. I reckon I can't speak on behalf of every GoC audience member.) As Vanassa, Lynne, and Lori-Anne screamed at one another while standing around the kitchen counter in your vacation home, I cleaned out my email inbox. Why? Because that sounded more enticing than watching them rehash the Mrs. America pageant drama for the zillionth time. The drama that feels like an aggressive breeze yanking a sailboat around the Newport harbor. A breeze that takes a sailboat in circles.

Neither this confrontation nor this party will actually go anywhere. What a great time to add all of the album artwork missing from my iTunes library!

Unless someone stepped in with some mighty strong booze-a-hol, that is.

“This whole conversation, I feel like we’ve been saying the same things over and over and over again for the last 15 minutes,” Shelley said after she foisted a tequila shot upon Lynne.

Bless you, Shelley.

Shelley would not let the boat do donuts for a moment longer. She would dole out tequila shots until it rerouted. It would be the fuel that would help the group reach its destination: I'm Sorry For What I Said & Did Island.

I was locked in:

The next morning, a hungover Lynne said her apology "was the tequila talking," so no, the Lynne versus Vanassa conflict isn't over. We'll be back on the high seas in no time.

Thanks for the brief vaycay to I'm Sorry For What I Said & Did Island, Shelley. It was fun while it lasted. It's always such a bummer when a vaycay comes to an end. Alas, we've returned to real life, aka Everyone Fighting About Everything Ocean. I guess I'll get some Dramamine.

Image: Bravo