Entertainment

What Should She Do Next If A Divorce Happens?

by Mallory Schlossberg

I was simply minding my own business on the Internet — writing about Frozen or Taylor Swift or my love of Mexican food — scrolling through my Twitter feed, when I noticed something that shook my pop culture loving soul: BEYONCÉ AND JAY Z MIGHT BE GETTING A DIVORCE. No. It can't be. Who the hell is the alleged "source" who told Us Weekly that Beyoncé is prepping her divorce plans and that her marriage has come to an end?

Sure, as the rumors increased, I got the sense that their split might happen, but it seemed like the Beygency was keeping naysayers at bay. They wouldn't let these Bey-Jay split rumors get out of hand, would they? Unfortunately, I now don't know what to believe. As much as I hope that they're not, the rumors could be true.

So now, we Beyoncé fans are in a bind until a reliable source, such as one of Bey or Jay Z's reps, or Beyoncé's Instagram, tells us the divorce is for real or, on the other hand, is just another tabloid sham. If it is for real, well, then there's a big question... what's next for Beyoncé? What should she do musically?

If we dig back into Queen Bey's musical history, she sang a whole lot about being an independent woman and not taking bullshit from any dude with whom she was involved. Destiny's Child songs basically added up to a soundtrack that celebrated female independence. Of course you remember "Independent Woman," do you not? If you don't, that's blasphemous, but I'll forgive you, and I'll jog your memory:

And of course you remember "Survivor," right? I'mma suriva, I'm not gon' give up! It was an anthem.

And even post-Destiny's Child, Bey was singing "Irreplaceable." To the left, to the left! Everything Jay Z owns in a box to the left.

And what about "Single Ladies?" That song is not for the taken women.

So, yeah, even though Bey sang about how she was "Crazy In Love" and "Drunk In Love," in the post-Destiny's Child era of her career, there's still no doubt that she knows how to create a mega-hit out of singlehood. In fact, it's likely that she'll hit us with a musical doozy if there's a split. Here's what I'm thinking she should do, post Jay Z divorce.

A concept album

Doesn't a concept album seem fitting? Like, a total Sasha Fierce album, or a story album? Something that basically has "GRAMMY" written all over it?

Some serious power ballads

Above is "Listen" from Dreamgirls. That ballad showcases Bey's killer voice. When one is in pain, one's voice soars. I know this from growing up listening to Celine Dion and Christina Aguilera.

Probably some lyrics referencing the surfboardt

There's nothing more powerful than claiming your own surfboardt!

A few songs with Destiny's Child

It is high time for a Destiny's Child reunion (please, oh please?). Hello, "Independent Woman Part 3!"

A re-Beyonce-assaince

First of all, that is fun to say. Second of all, while Bey's career certainly doesn't need a renaissance at all, this might be an excuse for a fun reinvention. OR A TOUR. Always a tour. A "Single Ladies" tour. Put yo hands up.

Images: Giphy (4)