If This Spinoff Is Real, Sign Me Up

OK. What I'm about to write seems too good to be true, so until Bravo confirms it, I will remind myself it could be nothing more than an empty rumor every time I start to get emotionally invested: According to LALATE, Vanderpump Rules star Stassi Schroeder is getting her own spinoff. Yes, the "Stassi is supposedly getting her own show" rumor is a rumor that's been flying around for some time now (and I'd all but written it off as nothing more than a beautiful dream), but this particular report is full of crazy-amazing details that I cannot ignore. And though I cannot ignore these crazy-amazing details, I must keep them at arm's length. Otherwise, I fear I may combust.

According to the LALATE exclusive, the Vanderpump Rules spinoff is currently in development. Allegedly, the show's working title is Vanderpump Rules Superfan and it will be hosted by Stassi.

Oh my god.

The LALATE exclusive continues:

Vanderpump Rules star Stassi Schroeder will work with you, going to any length to prank your superfan girlfriend, friend, or relative in sneaky and outrageous way!

So not only is Bravo allegedly throwing its hat into the prank show ring, but the alleged prank show that is allegedly in development is a Vanderpump Rules prank show? And Stassi is the alleged host of this alleged Vanderpump Rules prank show?

I can't feel my hands or my face.

Producers are looking for a loyal Vanderpump Rules viewer, who happens to be obsessed with Stassi Schroeder, and lives in Southern California.

Wait, are the producers looking for me? Because I fit that description to a T. I'm in.

...Unless I'm the one being pranked. I'm cool with being the prankster. Not cool with being the prankee.

They will then prank the female guest’s boyfriend or husband, drawing upon Vanderpump Rules as the backdrop.

I would get to hang out with Stassi and pull prank on my boyfriend? Welp, that sounds absolutely perfect. If Vanderpump Rules Superfan is real, I will do whatever I can to get on that show.