Justin Bieber Covers "All About That Bass" & The Results Are Unintentionally Hilarious — LISTEN

Some sentences you wish you'd never read, some sentences you wish you could keep with you forever. "Justin Bieber covered Meghan Trainor's 'All About That Bass'" is both. I'd ask "why, why, whyyy???" but I'm pretty sure the answer is just "Justin Bieber."

Trainor's "All About That Bass" has been at the top of the charts for five weeks running, having dethroned Taylor Swift's "Shake It Off." Some have called it out for skinny-shaming, others have lauded it for championing bigger bodies in a society that routinely degrades and shuts those bodies out. In other words, it's already a pretty confused song. Add Bieber to the mix and things just become surrealishly awkward.

Whether or not "All About That Base" pulls off its mission (and that's clearly debatable), it plays like an anthem by women and for women. This puts Bieber's additions — which happened thanks to Maejor's remix — in a whole other, bizarre realm. Why are you singing this song, Justin Bieber? What led you here? What are you feeling while you sing it? And why are the vocals...well, what they are? Why is any of this what it is?

Step away from the covers for a while, Bieber. Or at least find one that's a little less...this.