What do you do when Google fails you? It's the case with the search "How tall is Meghan Trainor?" which the all-seeing Google eye cannot provide an answer to. This has only happened to me a few times in my life and I feel betrayed so I am taking it on as my responsibility to provide other curious searchers with some semblance of an answer. The "All About That Bass" superstar is everywhere nowadays, standing tall figuratively, but how tall does she stand literally? WE DEMAND ANSWERS. Bustle has previously provided an answer to another pressing celebrity height query, that of Amal Alamuddin Clooney, who we concluded is 5'8". We are here for you in these times of confusion.
First order of business is to go straight to the source: Meghan Trainor's own personal Instagram. Evidence shows that the star is suspiciously private about just how tall she actually is. Most of her photos are from the waist up or close-up selfies. Which, while adorable, do nothing to sate our curiosity. Luckily, lately she has had a number of appearances where she's been forced to stand next to other people, so at least we can make some educated conjectures.
We Begin with the mystery...
Girl, WHAT? Trainor is particularly fond of those badass boots, which have a chunky, high heel. Which, while feisty, trick the eye and confuse the brain as to her height.
Where can I get a pair, though?
Dancing on Ellen
Pretty cute, no? We know that Ellen DeGeneres is 5'7", and in this video Trainor appears to be about an inch taller. BUT, a closer look at her fierce boots shows that they've got a significant platform. Probably like four to five inches. So we start with a base height of 5'2". Petite!
Google resolutely defines Ellen's height:
Awwww, she's the same height as Portia de Rossi. OK, I digress...
Hey now, hey now...
Here she is with fellow blonde buddy Hilary Duff, who is 5'2". Meghan's taller than her in this picture, but it's deceivingly from the waist up. I would have to guess that she's wearing those skyscraper heels, so for all I know she could be even shorter than Duff — amending my original guess to 5'0''.
Back it up
Here she is with all her beautiful backup dancers but they are anonymous, of course. No clues here, except that of course she would choose dancers shorter than her!
Getting frustrated at this point
Starting to suspect she doesn't have legs.
NOTHING IS CLEAR MEGHAN!
A break in the case!
Stills from this interview with Bow Wow are about as close as we can get to seeing Meghan Trainor with flat shoes on. But hold up, Bow Wow is also 5'7", just like DeGeneres, and Trainor was wearing mad heels on Ellen that put her about the same height as the host.
Good thing there are close-ups of her shoes — which deceivingly are not flat at all, but FLATFORMS that I would guestimate to be around three inches.
So where does she stand?
Based on this heavy research, I'd say that Meghan Trainor stands at about 5'3" to 5'4". About the average height for a woman, but she's nowhere near average. She's blowing up, and some day soon, we can hope, her actual height will be documented on Google, but until then, please accept my conclusion as the closest thing to fact. I've provided all necessary evidence. I'm all about them facts, bout them facts.