7 Jokes From Colbert's Final Election Special That Are Also Essential Truths
It was a jubilant and bittersweet night at the Colbert Report, with Colbert celebrating his last ever election special by rejoicing about the Republicans taking the Senate. As for the bittersweet part, this also marks his last midterm coverage. He began to say a fond, and frankly pretty sad, farewell to the audience, before realizing that he has a little while to go before the last episode. Along with the sad reminder of the tragedy to come, the episode also featured a lot of political truthiness. Here are some of the best moments.
1. "Incumbent Democrat and world's shortest poem, Jeanne Shaheen, won."
All do respect to Jeanne Shaheen, if you were at the polls without knowing anything about the candidates, wouldn't you pick the name that rhymes?
2. "Just as you suspected, Fox News keeps all their brains in one room... and it’s not the one with the cameras."
3. "What matters on election night is who has the touchiest touch screen."
Those newsrooms do have an exhausting number of gadgets.
4. "NBC has announced that live on air during the midterm coverage, Chris Hayes will go through puberty."
5. "[Democrats are] Weak-kneed lily-livered cowards."
OK, so that was actually this week's guest, political writer Andrew Sullivan, on Democrats. But still.
6. "Thank you. Thank me."
As expected, Stephen begins his farewell to his audience before realizing it's a little early.
7. "Someone's always running against someone else or other."
Alright, this one's not even a joke! Such wisdom. So jaded! I'll miss you, Stephen.