Life

A Mom Found Something Seriously Dark In This Toy

by Rebecca Jane Stokes

So this lady buys her kid a magical fairy princess wand from the dollar store. Then this lady becomes full of rage when her daughter peels back the reflective foil only to find a disturbing image of a teenage girl grinning maniacally while cutting herself. Did you hear someone darkly cackling and then saying, "Whaaaaaaaaaat?" for roughly forty minutes? If so, please pay no mind. It was just me, in the parlance of basic bitches everywhere, not being able to even with this story.

Here's what the irate dollar store mom fails to mention when she enlists the local news team in a bid to inspire outrage the county over: The actual packaging of this product doesn't call it a "totally benign if kind of cheap princess wand", it's called an "EVILSTICK". That's right you guys – "evilstick", one word. I don't know about you, but I feel like if you buy something by that name and it turns out to be a bit...sinister, you've got very little room to gripe.

The store owner's interview is a little cringe-worthy. Not so much the part where he admonitions parents to be more observant in their purchases (I'm right there with him) but the part where he insists the product is just fine for "5-year-olds because they see stuff like that on TV everyday." What television shows are they watching and can I find out what channels they are on immediately, please and thank you? #dark.

Is it wrong that immediately after watching this story, I went and spent maybe too many minutes seeing if I could buy an evilstick for myself? It probably is, right? I guess should probably be clutching me pearls and wailing about the innocence of young people today but really I just want to go on a prolonged tirade about how the dollar stores in my neighborhood never sell anything as remotely weird.

Image: YouTube