Entertainment

Which Nicki Minaj Identity Are You?

by Mary Grace Garis

A recent Complex Magazine feature worked desperately to figure out who the real Nicki Minaj is, dolling out every variation from early Mixtape Nicki to Diva Nicki to Pop Nicki and the even crazy outlier Roman. Minaj acknowledged that she believed that as a woman she had the right to be more than a singular personality, noting that typically, "Women suppress a lot of their sides." She, clearly, has never been one of those women, but it still begs the question: what kind of woman is she?

Let's be real, this isn't a particularly new debate. Everyone from your mom to Jenna Marbles has noticed that Minaj has had more than a handful of multiple personalities. No shade, no shade, it's definitely interesting to watch. But having her talk about this subject so candidly brings up so many more concerns, though. Trying to figure out which Minaj is the Nicki Minaj is difficult enough, but how do you know which Minaj identity is which? And, most importantly, which Minaj identity are you? The mind boggles.

To help us sort through this massive identity crisis, here's the abbreviated list of Nicki's and a helpful guide to figuring out which one is most like you.

"Mixtape Nicki"

Basically this is Vintage Nicki, the one that was busting out mix tapes in the late 2000's, waiting in the wings for stardom. This Nicki may be your spirit animal if you're still young, possess raw artistic integrity, and have dabbled in DJ Hero at least once or twice.

"Pop Nicki"

Songs like "Super Bass" best show the secret sugary side of Nicki, and that side is definitively Pop Nicki. It's the closest Nicki gets to being girlishly innocent and easily marketed. If you favor Katy Perry over Lil' Kim and aren't afraid to dial your attitude down a notch, congratulations, you're Pop Nicki.

"Diva Nicki"

Probably my favorite Nicki: the one that doesn't take anyone's shit. If you believe with full conviction that you're a queen, and that there are bold double-standards in how female assertiveness is perceived next to male assertiveness, then you're the boss Diva Nicki.

"Theatrical Nicki"

I'm not completely certain which Nicki this is. I would assign this as an overly-dramatic variant, but we already have a Diva Nicki. Instead, I think this probably the version of Nicki that starred in such hit films like The Other Woman. If you want to expand into different creative fields and can hold your own against the great acting prowess of Kate Upton, then you must be Theatrical Nicki.

"Fashion Nicki"

Again, I'm not fully following what defines this version of Nicki, but if I were a betting man then I would say this is the side of her that's dolled-up and dressed to kill. Which is pretty much any and all versions of Nicki, come to think of it, but the bright yellow caricature singing at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show is probably the shining example. If you've ever put money towards a neon wig and think metallic blue Urban Decay eyeshadow is a sound investment, then you're without a doubt Fashion Nicki.

“Alter Ego Nicki a.k.a. Roman.”

Like Sasha Fierce for Beyoncé and Slim Shady to Eminem, Roman Zolanski is the musical alter ego of Nicki. He is also an orange-haired, British, homosexual male which... OK. Basically Nicki created this separate persona to get out all her aggressions, and Roman is characterized by being far angrier, crazier, and more vulgar than any other incarnation of Nicki. If you become a completely different person when you're mad, you're definitely Roman, and should probably seek help for those rage issues.

“Dead-Ass-Tired-Lying-on-a-Couch Nicki”

The version of Nicki that's exhausted from answering a bunch of silly questions. This one is me. No competition.

"Nicki Minaj Nicki"

In spite of all the fractured personalities she seems to give off, Nicki is resigned in believing that you can be anyone and everyone you want to be. She sums this all up accordingly:

Every woman is multifaceted. Every woman has a switch, whether she’s going to be maternal, whether she’s going to be a man-eater, whether she has to kick ass, whether she has to be one of the boys, whether she has to show the guys that she’s just as smart or smarter, she’s just as talented or creative.

You heard it here first, folks. Minaj's identity is all about not allowing herself to be barred down to a single one-dimensional trope. She refuses to be limited and embraces a wide array of qualities. Therefore Minaj is every woman, and we are all Minaj. Glad we came to this conclusion together.

Images: Giphy (9)