I’m sure every one of us would like to think we’re all stars in the bedroom. The Michael Jordan of under the sheets. The Madonna of getting down and dirty. The Meryl Streep of making love. But, unfortunately, life doesn’t always look like the movies — especially our sex lives. We may not win the Oscar, but we would at least like to be nominated. Practice makes perfect, or at least will show some improvement.
So, here’s a little reminder of some possible sex mistakes you could be making.
Sometimes it’s important to be a little selfish and put yourself first. In bed is most definitely not the time, nor place. Who you are in bed is a proper indicator of your personality. Therefore, if you’re naturally a giver in life, you’ll be a giver with sex. Nobody likes a taker. Not in life, and not in the bedroom. It is better to give than receive, and giving generously is a surefire way to inspire your partner to give back.
Safety first, people — especially when it comes to getting down and dirty. When you’re hitting all the bases, you’ll want to cover all your bases. This means being as safe as you can be. Are you fully protected? Did you take your birth control? Did you come prepared with a condom? Have you discussed any possible STIs? With this protection, you can wake up in the morning to morning sex, instead of anxiety and worrying.
Setting up a sexy environment is key in the world of sex. No lady wants to be making love while she can hear QVC in the background. Make sure the mood is set. You don’t have to get all cheesy and buy a bunch of rose petals. A little candle and some nice music will do. Trust me, it will make for a much more enjoyable occasion.
Mr. or Mrs. Talks-a-Lot
Good conversation on a date is a must. However, this doesn’t apply while having sex. A little dirty talk is fine, but you don’t need to have a whole discussion. Sex is the one time a person can be in the moment — no thinking, and no talking. Everyone is different, but if your mate isn’t talking back, take that as a big sign to put a lid on it.
You’re not in a library, so there’s no need to be quiet. Blabbering on and on isn’t recommended, but staying mum is also a no-no. There’s nothing more uncomfortable and unsexy than awkward silence in the bedroom. Liven things up with a little moan or two. Let your vocal cords do the talking and show your partner you’re into it. Sometimes, what’s left unsaid, says it all.
Being fake in life and under the sheets will get you nowhere. By faking orgasms, the only person you’re hurting is yourself. It’s important to speak up for yourself and let your partner know what gets you off. The only thing that should be fake in bed is your spray-on tan.
Getting it on should be fun. But, one position over and over and over again isn’t. Spice it up with your moves. Test out new positions, new toys, and even the scenery. Keep your mate on your toes. Change is good — but it’s even better when it comes to shagging.
I’m always an advocate for speaking your mind, especially in bed. Screw me once, shame on you. Screw me twice and I didn’t communicate my needs to you, shame on me. Speak up and say what you want. Your partner isn’t a mind reader, so convey what you like and you’ll both be happy.
Forgetting the Foreplay
I cannot emphasize enough the significance of foreplay. It transforms good sex into great sex. If you're confused, think of cooking in the kitchen. You can’t just put a dish in the oven without preheating it first. In this instance, overheating may be a good thing.
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