Books

7 Things All Introverts Wish People Knew

by Chrissa Hardy

Introverts are fascinating creatures. Well, that's how others see us anyway — kind of like some rare, practically extinct species that very little research has been conducted on. Introverts have a penchant for solitude, we have no use for excessive socializing, and we usually have the wildest imaginations around town. Most people don't really understand introverts. They see us as strange anomalies who are suspiciously quiet and who don't conform to the desires that the majority of people seem to share. Most of the time though, we're written off as odd, boring, socially awkward, and seriously lacking in the fun department. And that sucks, because we are so much more than any of those lame-o labels — and we love to have fun.

Our friends and family, while they accept us and love us for who we are, also can't always grasp how we're feeling. Or sometimes they misread a reaction or statement we have and get offended. There are just some things we wish our loved ones understood about us. We've had many struggles that have shaped who we are, that really only other introverts have gone through. But here they are. Everything we want our friends, family, and acquaintances to know about us.

1. Not all introverts are shy.

It's not the same as introversion. Anyone can be nervous about social encounters, but not just anyone prefers solitude or intimate events to big social gatherings.

2. Just because we want alone time doesn't mean we don't love hanging out with you.

Time to ourselves is a way to recharge, so the next time we do hang out with you, we don't seem completely exhausted or frustrated. When we say, "no thank you" to a plan, it's because our conversational batteries are blinking red and about to die. Please just be cool about that and don't badger us on why we're "no fun."

3. Silence doesn't always need to be filled.

We don't mind dips and lulls in a conversation. In fact, we kinda love the break. So don't feel the need to verbally keep us entertained. We can easily entertain ourselves.

4. We enjoy getting lost in our own thoughts.

Daydreaming is where we're at our happiest, and possibly where we're hardest at work. It isn't just for kids or ladies who love Ryan Gosling. Where we lack in outward loudness, we make up for in internal flashiness.

5. Please do not ask us, "Why so quiet?"

Because that question is always laced with judgement and we have no time for that. We don't ask, "Why so chatty?!" do we? No, because that would be rude.

6. If your plans involve crowds and lots of small talk with a litany of people we don't know, maybe count us out.

It's not our scene. Thanks, but no thanks.

7. We like gifts in the form of books, streaming subscriptions, noise-canceling headphones, and cozy loungewear.

Anything that gives us the chance to be completely at ease in our blissful bubbles of solitude. That's really where we shine, just FYI.

Image: Rory Gilmore/WB; Giphy (7)