After a long pre-awards season, in which Boyhood was praised to the end of eternity and so many of us finally resolved to read Wild, the actual awards season is at last upon us. The Golden Globes air Sunday, January 11, and now we know who'll be presenting during the ceremony. The names are all, of course, Hollywood big names: Robert Downey Jr., Channing Tatum, Gwyneth Paltrow, Kevin Hart, Ricky Gervais, Salma Hayek, Kristen Wiig, Kate Hudson, Chris Pratt, and the legendary and beloved Lily Tomlin.
The Golden Globes are the less-stuffy, more-drunk version of the Oscars, so it is the prerogative — nay, the duty — of all who get onstage to make it a fun time. Sometimes the hooch gets the best of the stars in this venture — there's always at least one rambling, mostly-incoherent speech that has everyone in a state best described as "?!?!?" in its aftermath. But for those who do it well, it can be a nice boost for all involved, including the audience. Which is why it's crucial that the Golden Globes producers pair the right people with the right people. An awkward presenters pair with no chemistry, who don't know how to improv or banter together? That can hurt both actor and audience.
Here are my suggestions.
Chris Pratt & Channing Tatum
They can talk about being It Boys and compare biceps, it's guaranteed to give hosts Tina Fey and Amy Poehler some good swooning ammo.
It's also yet to be seen how much the Sony hackings will get mentioned in the proceedings (it's obviously a sensitive subject for Hollywood), but if Fey and Poehler pile it on in their monologue, we miiight get a mention of that amazing email Tatum sent. Aside from David Fincher's humor, it was truly the greatest thing to come out of that crappy situation.
Gwyneth Paltrow & Kate Hudson
I've got a feeling they'll pair Paltrow and Downey Jr. because Iron Man, but Hudson and Paltrow are just so blindingly blonde, I want to see if we'll still have our eyesight after they take the stage together. Plus they were both on Glee and I want someone to convince Hudson to do more TV.
Robert Downey Jr. & Salma Hayek
Hayek's new trailer for Everly shows her at her most badass, so maybe Downey Jr. can recruit her to the Avengers.
Lily Tomlin & Kristen Wiig
This is probably already what they're planning, for which I am grateful. One legendary funny lady with one relatively up-and-coming funny lady. Bonus: Wiig's a gem at Golden Globes presenting, and all you have to do is look at the silliness of that time she presented with Will Ferrell to see it. "You GET OUT OF HEERE."
Ricky Gervais & Kevin Hart
I'm just gonna go on a limb and guess that if something offensive is said this night it will be said with these two onstage together. And that's just looking at Gervais' previous gig hosting the show.
Alternate pairing: Chris Pratt & Lily Tomlin
If anyone makes out at the 2015 Golden Globes, I want it to be them. And even if there are no makeouts, these are just two very funny people.
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