Life

9 Struggles Only Homebodies Understand

by Chrissa Hardy

If you're a homebody, the struggles of everyday life are real and abundant. The world caters to our needs more than it once did, sure, but homebodies are still pretty far from having it easy. Our special, happy place is at home, where all of our favorite things can be found, but pretty much everything we need in order to survive and thrive is located outside of that space. Need food? Gotta hit the grocery store. Need money? Your job is probably at least a few blocks away. Most homebodies prefer to stay in, we appreciate anything with a home delivery service, and things like traffic and small talk with strangers are things that we could seriously do without.

I've found that homebodies are often introverts, since introverts require their bouts of alone time, and since leaving the house often comes with interacting with others. But at home, introverts can be their introspective, delightfully imaginative selves without having to worry about socialization of any kind. Not that homebodies don't love being with their family and friends — we just don't like being surrounded by all the people all the time. This makes life a bit tough, especially when there are people constantly asking us to get out there and do things. It's THE WORST. Here are all the struggles that homebodies regularly face in this loud, crazy world we live in.

1. Most companies do not offer telecommuting positions.

Not yet anyway. As someone who feels the most productive when working from home with 30 Rock reruns playing in the background (no seriously, Kenneth's voice helps me think), this just bums me out. Chatting and fountain dwelling and sharing a desk with someone else is just distracting. Get with it, job world. There are a lot of us who feel this way.

2. Date nights are only date nights if you actually leave the house.

Otherwise it's just Wednesday and you're ordering the same veggie chow mein dish you always get. Date nights are awesome and so necessary for every couple to keep that loving spark alive, but getting out means well... getting out. Which is the opposite of staying in so...

3. Having best friends who are also homebodies is kind of a problem.

I have friends who get my desire to stay inside my cozy little bubble as much as possible, and that's wonderful, but some of them are the same way, and that makes it difficult for us to make plans. We both always want to be home.

4. Not everything is available on Amazon Prime.

I want Amazon to eventually own every one of my favorite brands and force them to offer me free two-day shipping on anything my little heart desires. But sadly, we are not quite there yet. And it's actually pretty depressing when I can't find something I need on Amazon. It happens rarely, but when it does, I'm left to question everything. Like, what is the meaning of life, even?

5. When clothes bought online don't fit.

The only good part about going to a physical clothing store is the opportunity to try things on. It's still not enough to get me to shop outside of my top three dot-coms (Banana Republic, Forever21, and ModCloth), but it's enough to get me to consider it when the box arrives and the contents are the wrong size.

6. Being a dog owner and having to take them outside to pee.

Can't our furry children just get with the program and learn to use a toilet? For pete's sake, most of them are wearing cardigans and eating organic veggies now anyway. They're practically humans.

7. Most doctors don't do house calls.

Didn't they all do house calls in the 1800s? Can we just go back to that? Those waiting rooms are sneeze-filled germ pods cluttered with cranky impatient a**holes (myself included) who are ready to punch a wall up until the moment when their name is called. So yeah... THE WORST.

8. Home delivered grocery services are not perfect yet.

I mean, we're getting there but we're not exactly there-there. Amazon Fresh can do most of the basics in produce and packaged meals, but they are still missing a lot of the fresher, pre-made but still healthy items that typically occupy at least half of my cart when I go to the store. I have very specific cold pressed juice, pre-cut fruit, hummus, and frozen breakfast sandwich needs, you guys.

9. We're in 2015 and not 2025.

I can only imagine what a difference 10 years will make for all of us homebodies. I'm envisioning each of us being able to work from home, have lunch dates with our besties over Skype only, or maybe using a teleportation tube to easily pop in and out of our friends' apartments with ease, and owning a drone butler named Jeeves (because really, a butler by any other name would seem strange) and commiserating about the struggles of having to get up off the couch just to go to the fridge, because shouldn't Jeeves be providing all fridge-to-couch deliveries? Ah, what the future may hold....

Image: New Girl/Fox, Giphy (9)