In what is becoming one of the most painful reminders of the year thus far, the cast of Parks and Recreation have officially wrapped their seventh and final season, which means after these last remaining few episodes we will be Leslie Knope-less for the rest of our days. Pretty depressing, right? Well, as a way to help offset our remorse, Entertainment Weekly had the genius idea to have each member of the Parks and Rec crew reveal their own personal dream scenes that they always wanted to film, but just never got around to doing. I like to think of them as: The Pawnee Scenes That Almost Were.
Now, of course, this is going to make you immediately stomp around in a full-out hissy fit, demanding that these amazing scenes actually happen. Because in true Parks and Rec fashion, the gang had a ton of great ideas that should be allowed to come to fruition. (All those immediately in favor of a Season 8, raise your hand!) But alas, that's a battle for another day, I suppose. In the meantime, I thought it would be fun to rank these would-be scenes from worst to absolute best. So check out the results below and see if your favorites end up on the top, bottom, or somewhere in-between:
The Gergich Family Goes on Vacation… To a Thimble Museum?
“Jerry with his family on vacation. God knows what ridiculousness goes on, what little rituals they have. There wouldn’t be a moment where they’re apart. The Gergiches would love a good water park, maybe a thimble museum.” - Jim O'Heir (Jerry/Terry)
You know I just had to put Jerry down at the bottom no matter what. God, Jerry. Nobody wants to go hang out with you and your family. Jeez.
Tom Crashes & Burns
“Maybe an episode about Tom getting a motorcycle, and he just thinks he’s so cool, and then he immediately gets hurt. He probably would be checking his phone to order food or something on Seamless and then he hits a telephone pole.” - Aziz Ansari (Tom)
You've got a lot of flair, Tom, but I'm not sure even your charm could make this plot line work.
Ben Deals With an Ex-Factor
“I thought it’d be fun to have an ex-girlfriend come visit… I thought it could be funny for Leslie to get jealous. There’s a thing that all guys have that if you run into exes, you immediately just feel guilty. You feel like you’ve done something wrong even though it’s in the past and I think Ben is the kind of person that would spiral into this feeling of guilt and premeditated guilt in a sense, like guilt that doesn’t have to be there. I thought that could have been funny—he’s a pretty neurotic person.” - Adam Scott (Ben)
This could definitely be fun if done the right way, but I tend to think that the whole "meeting the ex" trope, in general, is a little overused these days.
Donna & Andy Lock Lips
“Where I get to make out with Chris Pratt. I thought they’d do it as a dream sequence or something. But I wanted there to be a point where Donna made out with Andy Dwyer and Andy was like, ‘Damn, girl—now I get it!” - Retta (Donna)
You do you, girl. Treat yo self!
Ron Swanson Puts Up His Dukes (Silver)
“Ron in an old-timey boxing ring, fighting a local bruiser. It would be kind of an Ivan Drago, perhaps from Eagleton. He would be menacing and get his licks in, but Ron would somehow stoically avoid his punches enough and then with one haymaker, knock him out of the ring.” - Nick Offerman (Ron)
Anything involving Ron is OK by me. Bring. It. On.
Leslie Knope Was Bourne This Way
“It would have been nice to have one scene where we in real cold outside in real snow. Or it would have been cool to do some kind of Bourne Identity scene where Leslie just out of nowhere sneaks up behind some guy and breaks his neck and it’s never explained.” - Amy Poehler (Leslie)
Sold!
Andy Gets Political
“Andy might have been a good politician if he was representing a party who didn’t need someone to think on their own. I always pictured Andy running against Leslie and doing well by simply sticking to talking points, none of which he fully understands or believes in.” - Chris Pratt (Andy)
I mean, who wouldn't love to see the outcome of that race? That's comedic gold, right there, my friends!
April's Family Revealed!
“A family party of April’s. You see my parents and you meet my sister but that’s all you get of my family. Because I’m half-Puerto Rican, I’ve always envisioned there could’ve been a really funny party scene with all of my Puerto Rican relatives being crazy… Just so many drunk Puerto Rican uncles and aunts and cousins salsa dancing. And then inviting Leslie Knope and Ron Swanson into that scene would be kind of amazing. Or April’s family meets Andy Dwyer for the first time and he’s salsa dancing with my family. She would be into it. The weird surprising thing would be that April loves it… But it’ll never happen because the show’s over and we’re all going to die.” - Aubrey Plaza (April)
YASSS! I mean, no to the whole dying part. But yes, yes, and YES to everything else. Let's make this happen, writers!
Images: NBC; Giphy (5); parksandburgers/Tumblr; nbcparksandrec/Tumblr; leslieknopelifecoach/Tumblr
