Entertainment

Chris Hemsworth Is "Just Trying To Be Sexy"

by Kristie Rohwedder

Tuesday morning, handsome male celebrity Chris Hemsworth paid the TODAY show a visit. The handsome male celebrity's mission: promote Blackhat, a movie about hacking and typing fast. (Side note: I feel compelled to sing “Black cat, nine lives/Short days, long nights/livin’ on the edge, not afraid to dieeee” every time I hear the title of the film. Never mad about it.) After discussing the movie, Savannah Guthrie asks Hemsworth how life has been since last fall's People magazine Sexiest Man Alive coronation. Hemsworth replies, “Just trying to be sexy.”

Before the interview draws to a close, Guthrie tells Hemsworth to “stay sexy.” He replies, “I’m trying.”

Oh, thank goodness. It's so wonderful that he takes this title seriously.

"Wait. What are you talking about?" you ask. "Does this babe even have to try at being The Sexiest Man Alive? And what do you mean by 'he takes this title seriously'?"

So glad you asked. There's more to being The Sexiest Man Alive than just being a hunk. There are things a Sexiest Man Alive can do that directly conflict with the title. Here are some examples of other Sexiest Men Alive who have exhibited not Sexiest Man Alive behavior:

Adam Levine (2013)

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See those uneven sleeves? Of course you do. Those uneven sleeves are SO distracting. The Sexiest Man Alive must make sure his sleeves are always even. Otherwise, the uneven sleeves will steal focus away from his sexiness.

Channing Tatum (2012)

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How dare he pose with a disgusting-looking smashed breakfast pastry. The Sexiest Man Alive should only pose with sexy breakfast pastries.

Bradley Cooper (2011)

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He's wearing a watch. Here's a fun, little-known fact that I didn't totally make up: the Sexiest Man Alive has the power to tell time without a clock. Wearing a watch is disrespectful to the title.

Ryan Reynolds (2010)

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Holding a piece of paper? SERIOUSLY? There are few things less sexy than the looming threat of a paper cut that comes with every piece of paper.

Let these be lessons to you, Hemsy-Hems. Keep those sleeves even. Steer clear of mangled pastries. Leave the wristwatches at home. And don't you ever dare handle a loose sheet of paper.

Images: Getty (4)