This Diet Will Make You Want to Binge Eat Oreos

Kara Rosen, founder of PlenishCleanse, recently gave an interview with The Telegraph, and as you'd expect, the head of a company that sells products for "intermittent fasting without the calorie counting" has a totally normal and well-balanced diet. HAHA just kidding, her "Day on a Plate" is the most depressing thing ever, seriously. To give you an idea of the kind of life you're about to experience secondhand, it begins with her voluntarily waking up at 6 a.m. to a hearty breakfast of some "hot water and lemon before a shower," BuzzFeed reports. She has a salad for lunch at work. Oh, and she describes rice cakes as "carby," which is so out of touch that it almost made me think she was trolling us for a second, but then she goes on to say she combats her mid-afternoon slump with spicy juice. Anyone who comes up with something that painfully health-conscious has got to be sincere. (I get the feeling that Rosen desperately wishes there was a way to digest huge gusts of wind. Air is calorie-free and all natural.) As for dinner, you'll be shocked to read that it's... another salad! This one has everyone's least favorite leafy green, kale, and uses argan oil for dressing. Mmm, the taste of hair product.

Unsurprisingly, people aren't really into her lifestyle. Within a day, spoofs of her "Day on a Plate" started popping up around Twitter.

Much more relatable, wouldn't you say? Rosen hasn't commented publicly about her article going viral yet, but I imagine she's drinking a lot of calming hot water right now.