In the beginning of a relationship, everything seems magical. The sun is shining, the birds are singing, and you are in love. You think, “How can a relationship be this perfect?” After months and months of this bliss, or even years, relationship reality settles in. I know we all wish our relationship was like a fairytale with no wicked witches, but life doesn’t seem to work that way.
Just like the weather, there will be highs and lows in your relationship. It’s normal, so don’t run for cover so quickly. It’s crucial to know how to survive the storms together. Trust me, you’ll have some brighter days ahead.
But, staying the course during a rough patch is easier said than done. Sometimes you may feel like you want to throw in the towel. When you can’t necessarily see the light at the end of the rough patch tunnel, how do you two make it through?
There are some things that can truly help you during this tough time. Along with these tips, you both need to be dedicated towards making things better. Here’s to making it through hard times together and coming out stronger than ever — how Beyoncé and Jay Z of you two.
Awareness Of The Rough Patch
First things first, you need to understand where this rough patch is coming from. Awareness of the problem will help you figure out the solution. If you just ride this rough patch without questioning where it came from, you won’t be doing your relationship any favors. You both need to look at the reason your partnership has hit a low in order to get back to a high.
Communication is key, and it’s the right key that is going to unlock this rough patch. I know it isn’t easy being 100% honest with each other, but it’s the only way out of this dark hole. You both need to first admit that you are going through a tough time. Then, talking it through with each other will help you decide what’s the problem and how you both can fix it.
Talking it out will help you get back on track. But, talking it out with a professional can help you two get back on the right track. Put aside all of those assumptions and fears about going to see a couples’ therapist. Trust me, more people than you know are seeking help. You’re probably out of the loop, if you aren’t.
Acceptance Of The Ups And Downs
Be sure to find your inner Buddha and learn to accept. Thinking that your relationship will always be perfect is setting yourself up for failure. A relationship isn’t supposed to be picture perfect. There will be scratches and some parts will fade. But, knowing this is normal will help you when the rough patches come around. There will be valleys and peaks, so if you are aware of the valleys, you can better prepare for them.
Sometimes, we get stuck in a rut. We let our inner Debbie Downer take over and all we see is dark clouds up ahead. This can happen very easily when your relationship isn’t going so swell. You get swallowed up in the negative and let it carry you away. So just like that orgasm you once faked in college, you need to fake it ‘till you make it with happiness. Create some positive energy, even if you aren’t feeling it yet. Who knows, it may lead you to some happier days.
You need to hit refresh, just like you hit that snooze button every morning. Even if you aren’t feeling very lovely-dovey, bring back the romance. Plan something nice for the two of you. Surprise your partner with a cute love note or a silly little present. Similar to when the internet freezes — refreshing the page or your relationship makes a world of difference.
Use Love Languages
Remember to tap into you and your partner’s love languages. Maybe this rough patch is due to you both not feeling romantically fulfilled. That is why it is important to communicate your emotional and physical needs to your partner. Knowing how your significant other feels loved by you is vital to making him or her feel secure and happy.
Image: Pedro Ribeiro Simoes/Flickr