How's your heart these days? Is it constantly aflutter with feels for your object of affection? Is it cluttered with arrows shot by Cupid? Is it ready to explode into a mass of animated mini hearts on February 14? Valentine's Day is supposed to be about love and celebrating those who have a significant other to share the day with. It's nice, sure, but it's also an alienating tradition for those who happen to find themselves with a "single" Facebook status on this particular date.
But fear not, single folk, because there's something better than having a date on Valentine's Day. And that something is cheese. You might be thinking, how could a dairy product possibly compare to the warm body of a human? How can it top the love shared between two committed individuals? How can a food item be better than a date? Easy, because cheese is the answer to every question, predicament, and serious problem. Cheese cures all — even the blues that attach themselves to a lonesome heart on Valentine's Day. Why get all dressed up to spend too much money on a greeting card holiday when you could be at home in your sweats inhaling multiple blocks of cheese? Here are all the reasons cheese is better than having a Valentine's Day date.
1. Because cheese will always put you in a good mood.
Think about the foods you love. They're probably all covered in cheese or have cheese as the main ingredient: pizza, nachos, cheese fries, cheesecake, etc. You get the point. It will always make you smile.
2. Because cheese will never show up late.
It is always in your fridge at the perfect moment you need it to be. And will never send a text asking you to "meet outside in 5."
3. Because cheese will never give you a gift you don't want.
It's not a box of weird chocolates with mysterious centers. It's not a bouquet of flowers that will die within three days. When you reach for cheese, you're looking for a rich flavor and ultimately a full belly. Cheese will always deliver on both.
4. Because cheese is like the Chris Pratt of foods.
It's a versatile, charming food that can hang in any crowd. It can find its place in sushi just as easily as with the burritos and tacos. Everyone loves cheese, and cheese loves everyone. It compliments any dish, and becomes the humble star.
5. Because cheese will always be there for you.
When the rain starts to pour, cheese will be there for you... like it's been there before. (OK, I need to put a pause on the Netflix Friends-a-thon, clearly.)
6. Because it's great cold, but even better hot.
Doesn't matter how it's prepared, or what the weather is like, or what you're in the mood for. Cheese will always find a way to be irresistibly delicious.
7. Because cheese is easy to dress up or down.
Fancy party? Pair it with wine. Schlub night on the couch? Take a can of cheese product and spray it directly into your mouth. It has hot days and hot mess days just like the rest of us. Cheese just gets you.
8. Because you can eat it for every meal.
Why just have cheese as a dinner date when you can have it for breakfast and lunch too? A date is typically one meal, but cheese is in it for the long haul.
9. Because there's no such thing as too much cheese.
You don't need to worry about coming on too strong or moving too fast with cheese. Whatever pace you choose will work for cheese.