In Other News: Susan Rice NSA Rumors, "Grow Up" Congress, and Syrian Monkeys
United States ambassador to the UN Susan Rice might soon be heading up the NSA. There's a job everyone's got to be clamoring for.
China's had enough of taking on everyone else's trash and is going to really, honestly start recycling.
A 9-year-old girl says what we're all thinking and told Congress to "grow up." Her outrage was sparked when a field trip to Mammoth Cave National Park was shut down because of the shutdown. The park does look pretty cool.
Literally the grossest cure ever (three words: fecal transplant pills) may solve serious intestinal infections. Thanks, medicine, I guess!
San Jose, California has the nation's fittest and happiest baby boomers, and top life expectancy predictions mean they'll stay that way for a long time.
But if they should ever get sick, they should know that doctors are seriously over-prescribing antibiotics for bronchitis and sore throats these days.
Finally! Scientific-y proof Google search is definitely better than Bing. (Meaning this video is no longer true.)
Jezebel brought attention to a marketing survey that's seeks to decode exactly when and in what states a woman feels ugliest. As Callie Beusman puts it: "Happy Monday, you giant bewigged naked mole rat! Have you considered purchasing eyeliner?"
And finally, a carb-craving rebel army of ugly-butted monkeys relieve a Syrian army car of all of its breadly goods. Talk about an Atkins revolution.