Liz Lemon sucks at Valentine's Day. She has exemplary taste in junk food and sweaters, but the annual celebration of love is just not her thing. She often bungles her plans, has super awkward Valentine's Day dates, and she ends up regretting any attempt to acknowledge the holiday in the first place. As is the case in most of life's tricky scenarios, we are Liz Lemon, and Liz Lemon is all of us.
Over the seven seasons of 30 Rock we were treated to a weekly hang with LiLem, she took V-Day to a whole new level of #eyeroll. First, she forgot it was Valentine's Day and worked all night. Then, a few years later, she forgot it was Valentine's Day and had her first date with Drew (the guy who was too hot to realize he was an idiot). Then, to skip the day altogether, she scheduled oral surgery and hallucinated that Drew, Dennis, and Floyd were there to pick her up. They weren't, and she ended up sticking a waffle in her DVD player at home. In one final attempt to get Valentine's Day right, she and Criss spent the day stuck in IKEA trying to find a table on which to have their romantic dinner. Despite the chaotic series of events that were thrown her way, Liz Lemon actually seemed to get Valentine's Day right. Here are all the reasons why.
1. Because having to work late gets you out of everything
It's the easiest way to keep you from doing something you don't want to do.
"Oh, you have a slam poetry reading at that crowded bar in that sketchy neighborhood? Drat, I have to work late!"
2. Because surgery means anesthesia (a.k.a a nice nap)
If there's a surgical procedure you need to get, hold off until V-Day. Because anesthesia means sleeping for however long and waking up without any knowledge of how much time has passed.
3. Because recovering from surgery means ice cream and pajamas
Then comes the post-surgical recovery period, which means taking it easy and not doing anything that requires real pants. And all the (insert your guilty pleasure food here) that you want.
4. Because staying home and making a cheese-based stew is how every holiday should be celebrated
"Thanks, it's my own recipe. I use cheddar cheese instead of water." Sheer culinary brilliance, right there.
5. Because building furniture is a nice distraction
Doing it by yourself or doing it with your SO and fighting about where that last little piece is supposed to go will keep your mind occupied and away from pressure-filled relationship talks or analyzing what that gift is supposed to represent.
6. Because IKEA has meatballs
And meatballs solve any and all problems.
7. Because we all suck at Valentine's Day
There's no possible way for any of us to live up to the hype this holiday creates. No gift will be as good as the one you imagine, because you've been subjected to all of those ridiculous "He went to Jared" commercials. So just lean into it like Liz Lemon does, and take Valentine's Day failures to a delicious level of "BLERG." Who knows? You might just end up at home with your sexy SO and eating mashed potatoes out of a martini glass.
Image: Tina Fey/NBC; Giphy (7)