What Your Favorite Britney Spears Says About You (Note: Picking Your Favorite Britney Is The Hardest Part)
As my colleague Mary Grace Garis wisely pointed out, you can learn a lot about a person based on his or her favorite Brit Brit music video. And as my other colleague Alex Kritselis wisely pointed out, you can also learn a lot about a person based on his or her favorite Brit Brit song lyric. But the fun does not end there, my friend. It is time to find out what your favorite piece of Britney Spears says about you. And by "piece of Britney," I don't mean, like, eyeballs or arms. That'd be weird of me. By "pieces," I mean all of the different chapters out of Brit Brit's legendary career. Waaaay less weird of me.
I know what you're about to ask: Oh baby baby/How am I supposed to know/Which piece of Britney is my faaaaavorite? It's a fair question. So many chapters from Godney's career are perfect. It may seem like an impossible choice to make. My advice: just go with your gut.
(Before we begin, a quick disclaimer: If your favorite Britney is Shaved Head Britney or Umbrella Paparazzi Attack Britney, this list might not be for you. I intentionally omitted The Britney Spears Dark Ages. Yes, she made it through that rough era, but I don't really want to crack wise about it. Sorry? I guess?)
So, what does your favorite Britney say about you? Oh, I'll tell ya.
If your favorite B. Spears is... Crossroads Britney
It means: If you could, you'd go on a road trip every weekend with your besties. Road trips = EVERYTHING. Same can be said for karaoke. As far as you're concerned, anyone who doesn't appreciate the magic of a good karaoke bar needs to get his or her life right.
If your favorite B. Spears is... VMAs Madonna Smooch Britney
It means: Whether you're doing back handsprings on the dance floor or simply letting out a quiet yawn, you always know how to nab people's attention. And hey, you don't have any complaints.
If your favorite B. Spears is... Cheetos & Frappuccinos Britney
It means: You appreciate the chill side of life; sweatpants, t-shirts, and junk food is your foolproof way to unwind after a tough day. Order that extra whip. Live your truth, boo. No shame.
If your favorite B. Spears is... Chaotic Britney
It means: Your favorite food is butter beans.
If your favorite B. Spears is... "…Baby One More Time" Britney
It means: You miss high school. You never thought you'd long for the days when you were obligated to wear a uniform or adhere to a strict dress code, but damn if it didn't make getting ready in the morning a breeze.
If your favorite B. Spears is... Glitter Bodysuit Britney
It means: You looooove glitter. You can't resist sparkle. You're like a fish. You might even BE a fish.
If your favorite B. Spears is... Mickey Mouse Club Britney
It means: You. Love. Nostalgia.
If your favorite B. Spears is... "You Better Work, Bitch" Britney
It means: Being a leader > being a follower. Always.
If your favorite B. Spears is... X Factor Judge Britney
It means: You aren't the type to mince words. You genuinely believe honesty to be the best policy in every situation. Your best friend's new yellow-green nail polish makes her hands look infected? You'll be sure to let her know.
If your favorite B. Spears is... Pinky & Stinky Britney
It means: You are a hopeless romantic.
If your favorite B. Spears is... Eau de Parfum Queen Britney
It means: You've purchased all of the Britney Spears perfumes, duh. Your favorite Brit Brit song is "Perfume", duh.
If your favorite B. Spears is... VMAs Snake Britney
It means: You're terrified of reptiles but you hope to one day overcome your fear. You held your cousin's pet gecko once. Baby steps.
If your favorite B. Spears is... Las Vegas Residency Britney
It means: I am very jealous of you. I'm DYING to see Brit's Planet Hollywood extravaganza.
(I mean, if you picked this B. Spears, I assume you've gone to the Vegas residency. Sure, I could be wrong, but I'm sticking with my assumption.)
If your favorite B. Spears is... Mom Britney
It means: You tear up every time you watch the "Ooh La La" music video. Which, I get it. That video is stinkin' adorable.
Images: mylittlefaith, funnybritney, imverytoxic, ohmygodimtotallybuggin, aboutmissamericandream, chris-minaj, imadickted, henrrydelavega (2), realitytvgifs, xmidnightfantasy, bowlegschester, britneyspearsgifs, pantelicjelena/tumblr