There's nothing more frustrating than not knowing where you stand with someone. Both men and women have spent centuries trying to read through the signs. Does he/she like me? Am I in the friend zone? Will they ever see a future with me? Not to mention the fact, this very debate has spawned countless books and movies that we watch repeatedly as we nod our heads in agreement.
Yet, somehow we're still trying to figure out if that co-worker is actually flirting with us, or just really, really outgoing. And it certainly doesn't help that we just so tend to read into everything when we start to like someone.
Stop us if any of these scenarios have been you:
"But he/she texted me twice today, that has to mean something. Right? RIGHT?!?! Just tell me, I can take it!!"
"You don't just go to drinks with people one-on-one if you're not into them."
"Look, I know what I'm talking about, and we're not just friends. I mean, sure, we haven't hooked up — at all — but it's just because he/she is taking it slow. I get it."
Hey, we've all been there. Next time you're determining whether or not a guy or gal wants you, or just wants to high five you and that's about it, look out for these 7 signs. And if you are in the dreaded friend zone? There's good news. If they don't appreciate how awesome you are, this person isn't right for you anyway — and you can stop wasting your time right about now.
1. He/She brings along friends when you hang out
Let us clarify: This does not include group outings. But if every time you make plans to meet up, and he/she brings a long one or two friends, that's suspect. No one likes a block. If you're the object of his/her affection, they won't want anyone else around. Period.
2. He/She talks about other people
This is a tricky one, because depending on the emotional maturity of this person, this can at times double as a "make you jealous" or "try to gauge your reaction" tactic. However, for the most part, it's pretty black and white: If a person is chatting about someone he/she is into with you, well, then that someone isn't you. Their loss.
3. You're not touching. At all.
When we like someone, it's almost impossible for our bodies not to take over in some way. We don't even notice it half the time, that's how instinctual it is; if and when the touching does start infiltrating the flirting, you'll be opening the window for that person to do the same. And trust me, if he/she is into you, they'll nose dive right through it.
4. These friends have never heard anything about you
[The following is based on actual events]
Him: Guys, this is Liz.
Friends: [Zero recognition in their faces] Hey... What was your name again, Liz?
You: [Internally] Shoot me.
Typically when a guy or girl knows their buddy is into you, you can tell they've been told this fact merely by their facial reaction. They already know your name. They know everything. And they suck at hiding this fact.
5. You're his/her therapist
It's great when your relationship hits that point when you can really open up to somebody; we're in no way knocking that, because it means you're becoming intimate. Still, the key here is balance: Are you always the one picking up the pieces when he/she has a bad day at work? How many times have you provided advice on how to deal with a psychotic roommate? And the real tall-tale sign: Has he/she asked how you are in, well, ever?
If you're nodding along to this right now, consider yourself a friend... and a competitive hourly rate.
6. They ask you to go to the gym
Now let us clarify, because there is a very subtle — yet highly important — distinction with this one. The distinction being if they ask you to go to the gym, he/she is very comfortable and/or may not really give a damn what you think about them. BUT, if he/she offer to accompany you to your favorite SoulCycle or Pilates class, there's a very good chance he/she wants to marry you.
7. They say stuff like "The right person is out there for you."
Um, wait — I thought that was you?
Images: foxsearchlight.com; Tumblr