'The Voice' Season 5 Recap: We've Reached the End of The Battle Rounds

The Voice Battle Rounds ended Tuesday night. Whoa. When did that happen? It's just like that John Lennon lyric: "The Voice is what happens when you're busy watching TV on a weeknight." Nope, I definitely bungled that one. Moving on. We joined Blake Shelton, Christina Aguilera, Cee Lo Green, and Adam Levine for one last episode of head-to-head performances. In the coming weeks, we will watch the Knockout Rounds. And guess what? The coaches will get ONE. MORE. STEAL. But that starts next week, not this week. It is crucial that we stay present. Battles, you will be missed.


Jonny Gray vs. Shawn Smith, "Refugee": Jonny's tone was kind of Tom Petty-ish, but it didn't sound like an affectation. Shawn's voice was aggressive, growly, and very "rocker guy." The stark juxtaposition of the two vocalists made for an interesting performance. Neither competitor left anything on the table. Cee Lo described Jonny's sound as "frenetic," and I endorse that. I also endorsed when Cee Lo picked Jonny. His voice was more unique than the straightforward rock sound of Shawn's voice. No one stole Shawn. Poor dude.


Barry Black vs. Preston Pohl, "I Wish It Would Rain": Oh, this pairing was so delightful. Possibly one of my favorite duos of the season. They complemented one another's soulful vibes really nicely. During the rehearsals, Adam advised against Barry using his mouth trumpet trick during the battle. However, Barry went ahead and trumpeted anyway. The coaches praised the mouth trumpet, but that was about the extent of their comments for Barry. However, the coaches threw heaps of positivity at Preston. So when Adam crowned Preston the champ, it wasn't much of a twist. I was really sad no one stole Barry. I liked him a lot. I had anticipated another coach would readily add him to their team. That's what happens when you anticipate things. You make an "ticp" out of "ate" and "an."


Stephanie Anne Johnson vs. Olivia Henken, "Done": The first time I'd heard this song was during the rehearsals, and I was convinced the song was called "Dumb." I actually thought Xtina had the ladies singing, "I'm dummmmmmmb" over and over. Looks like I'm the dumb one. Anyway, "Done" is a country song and Olivia's voice was tailor-made for this track (then again, I don't know what I'm talking about. I've never heard the song). Her final note of the performance was rather epic. Stephanie had what Adam referred to as a "nugget of grit," which I agree with. Her voice was hot hot hot. I knew whoever didn't get picked would be stolen (because it was the final performance of the night and Cee Lo had one more slot left. Or maybe I'm a soothsayer), so I didn't fret over picking a winner. Xtina chose Olivia and Cee Lo scooped up Stephanie. Yay! We did it!

We saw three lightning-fast recaps of other battles. I literally sneezed and missed this part of the show. I don't mean "figuratively-literally." I mean "literally-literally."


No Team Blake performances, so that meant no Cher. What the hell, The Voice? Are you pissed at me for hating on last Tuesday night's episode? Come on. Don't be like that. I've forgiven you, you should forgive me. We're going to make it, The Voice. I promise.

Image: NBC