I used to think that people were exaggerating when they said they would sit on their couch eating entire pints of ice cream, until one fateful day when it happened to me. I have never felt such triumph, and I only have my period to thank. Without my internal misery cheering me on, I doubt if I ever would have passed this important life test. And nobody understands that triumph more than Parker Jones, a graphic design senior at Oklahoma State University who created PMS ice cream specifically to soothe your period pain. There truly are heroes in the world, friends. To be honest, I thought that we reached the peak of humanity's achievement with wine-infused ice cream, but just look at how wrong I was. In order to earn her forgiveness, I have officially dubbed Parker the Patron Saint of Menstruation, and if that already existed (why not?) then whoever it is will just have to share.
OK, slight buzzkill: The ice cream isn't actually real, but a part of a design project. That being said, the ice cream itself doesn't make us feel half as better as the hilarious outside packaging does. Her ice cream comes in three fictional varieties: "I Need Some More" mint chip, "I Think I'm Dying" strawberry, and "Don't Come Near Me" chocolate. This ice cream doesn't just understand you — it rips the words right out of your mouth. Although this brilliant invention has yet to actually exist, this is what it will look like if we all get aggressive enough to make it happen:
Here are the three different flavors up close, all of which I am ready and available to taste test ... in like, three weeks, if I'm calculating correctly.
It gets even better. There are indicators on the side that keep track of your misery relative to how much ice cream you've eaten.
Parker posted the project only a few days ago, and it has already gained so much widespread internet approval that I'm basically fully expecting to be able to buy one at my bodega before my next cycle hits. But Parker's love of puns and awesome graphic design skills go way beyond easing the psychological agony of your period. Here are some of her other awesome projects, which she posted on her Instagram account:
1. "Edgar Allen Poe Boys" sandwich shop branding
Quoth the raven, "Mustard on the side, please."
2. "Wild Salsa"
For when you run out of period ice cream, of course.
3. Dyslexia Awareness Posters
This is one of the coolest projects I've ever seen, especially with the impact of the way she gets the message across with the design. I really hope somebody uses these out in the real world. There are a whole bunch of posters just as cool as this on her portfolio site here.