Hey, you've always wanted a baby sloth, right? Maybe you didn't realize you did until you just read that sentence, but there's no denying the allure of one. You could just spend all day bro-ing around and doing whatever it is sloths do (they like Netflix, right?). Well, some clever humans played all of our sloth-loving heartstrings this past week when they posted a Craigslist ad for a free baby sloth as a prank, putting their unwitting friend Kameron's contact information for potential adoptive owners. Poor Kameron's e-mail and text inboxes were massacred by the end of the day.
Never mind how people thought that there was a baby sloth up for grabs in the middle of Indiana. This right here is an insight into human nature that I don't think any of us could have predicted. Why are we bothering with nuclear weapons and crazy technology to fight our wars? Clearly, we can just distract every kind of human being that there is with the three magical words "free baby sloth". Whoever harnesses this ridiculous amount of power is sure to rule the earth (or at least Central and South America, which is where sloths actually hail from).
In the meantime, however, all it's done is give poor Kameron a whole lot of grief. You can see for yourself just how this spiraled out of control in the course of a few hours, after his friends made the initial Craiglist post:
WELL THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY.
Can I just say that my #lifegoals are sending someone an email that says solely "Hi I'm interested in your baby sloth"? But seriously, look at this bb. It is all of the precious.
If I thought I had a chance at being that bae's best friend, I would be manically sending Kameron e-mails, too. I strongly suspect that baby sloths have magic powers, and if you don't believe me...well, these gifs speak for themselves:
BOOM. Now we're all sad that we are humans and not sloths.
R.I.P. Kameron's inbox, and our ability to function. At least it had a happy ending for Kameron, who already has the "K" in place to join the famous brood of his ~dreams~.